the purple cat speaks!

Voice of an Angel

2010-04-25T17:29:00.003+01:00

He falls asleep in my arms,

to me singing summer time.

In a low key - he finds comfort,

resting his head for some time.

"Voice of an Angel" - I put on the album,

and let Charlotte soothe him.

He awakes as I do not hum.

Looking at me, he remains calm.

Sitting in my arms

in deep contemplation,

of the face behind the voice.

Astounded and marvelled.

He remains still,

music makes him happy.

Note:I wrote this watching my bunny, Mambo listen to Charlotte Church for the very first time. Music makes him calm. He loves it. Wish I captured it on video.

London Underground

2010-03-31T16:55:00.002+01:00

In the underground,

travelling is a culture.

Click clacks everywhere.

Walking in haste.

Ipod's playing crazily.

Timeless classics in hands,

and now even in ears.

Mother with child,

pushing a stroller-chair,

hoping someone friendly

would help them down the stairs.

Like a time-bomb, minutes go-by,

in the underground.

Any delay or standby,

has a frustrating effect.

Each train operating at the heart beat of another.

running,

like the blood running through our veins.

A single block can cause infinite problems.

Never have I seen such an amazing transporting system,

connecting us to every part of the city,

making travelling achievable,

creating new possibilities,

drawing out a brand new culture.

Now we can stay connected.

Her eyes

2010-03-08T12:02:00.003Z

As I gently draw the purple curtains,

her deep set eyes open.

Blue as the evening sea,

and grey as a cloudy sky.

She looks and thoughts fill her mind.

Puzzled.

Curious.

In awe, she remains calm.

Two hearts

2010-03-06T10:54:00.003Z

The sound of hearts beat.

Two hearts.

One fast - like a chugging train.

the other one faster - like a race horse.

The clock ticks,

at the labour ward.

Across the hall you hear,

the screams of a woman,

the constant military like encoragement,

and a baby cries,

crying as it awakes into a brand new world.

I see the look on her face,

fear slipping in,

flooding her mind with traumatic thoughts,

panicking - just a little.

Sudden pain steps in,

blocking out all worries,

and for a minute or so,

she can think of nothing else,

but the pain.

The pain - unbearable.

Every second influencing her,

to succumb to an anaesthetic drug.

Although against the idea,

she frees herself from the pain.

Epidural - the world's most useful drug.

Injecting its way into her body,

numbing her waist down,

easing the pain, almost immediately.

She sleeps...

dreaming of what is to come,

dreaming of meeting her baby for the first time.

Hearts beat.

Hours pass and slowly the pain returns,

this time bearable.

20 hours of pain, discomfort, nausea, anxiety, fear, and impatience...

Finally using every bit of energy in her,

she pushes in a hurry to meet her baby...

For a moment, both hearts stop beating.

One in unbelievable shock,

the other in awe at the sight of a brand new world.

Breaking this moment,

the baby cries...

Holding her baby in her arms for the first time,

she relaxes,

and baby's crying eases.

Mother and baby,

at the comfort of each other,

close their eyes and rest.

Two hearts beating together.

- end-

I witnessed a birth for the first time a few days ago. It was a new experience.

I wrote this poem for the new mother...

Heat

2010-03-01T09:37:00.003Z

My pulse is beating rapidly

beads of sweat form on my brow.

my shirt - untucked.

I pick a steel glass of ice water,

and pour it down my shirt.

the water flows down my body,

numbing each part it touches.

I turn up my I tunes player,

a glass of chilled white wine in hand,

I close my eyes,

and let my mind wander,

into a world of unimaginable peace,

free from the world's worries,

free from emotional pain,

free from the unmanageable heat,

and best of all,

free from the workings of my restless mind...

I hear the sound of thunder.

It wakes me.

Time to put on some Rob Thomas and enjoy the rain...

Bernada Alba

2010-02-20T06:22:00.005Z

I picked up jazz ballet dancing 2 months ago. Just thought I'd get creative and do something totally out of my comfort zone.

I've always loved performing arts, but never really went down the dance route. I would take vocal training classes, write, direct plays & musicals and act. However I never really got into dance. Don't really know why either. I think for some reason, my mind told itself that my body isn't capable of being that flexible.

When I think dance, I think ballet. I think Swanlake, the Nutcracker, the Russians. Then later I start thinking of tap and folk dance, like Riverdance, Cats, Michael Flately-Lord of the Dance. All these dances, when watched, seem like they require so much talent. I put on a dance flick like Shall we dance (my favourite), Save the last dance, and Step Up and I honestly used to believe that those dances are only for people in love (I know, pretty cheesy).

I appreciate dance quite a bit. I love chic flicks, but not as much as a dance chic flick. I could watch ballet alone and not mind that I had no company to watch it with. I watch jazz dancing and feel like twirling around. Yet, I never got into it.

So 2 months ago, I decided I'd learn a dance. So I randomly picked Jazz Ballet. To tell you the truth, I only picked that style up because I saw the word 'CATS' in its description. For those of you who are unaware, I have this goal of being in the next production of cats. I'm learning all the dance moves from Cats and then am going to write to Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber and tell him I did so, all this to be in the next production. Off course, I already know all the vocals by heart.

What is jazz ballet?

It is a form of choreography which contains revolutionized ballet styles and movements usually employed for performance purposes. The dances you see in Cats and Chicago, that sorta thing...

Turns out dance has really been working for me. It really makes me relax, and when I'm on the dance floor - I feel like there isn't anyone left in the world but me and my dancing shoes.

I am totally in love with dancing. I'm even more excited as next week, a very good friend of mine, Ashvina Marie will be starring in this spanish musical called 'Bernada Alba'. It involves a lot of flamenco style dancing. Extremely excited. I am this excited not just because it involves dancing but mostly because Ash is in it. It's been a dream for me to see her in a musical in a large and reputable production. My dream is coming true. She is amazing!

Those of you in Malaysia, go watch Bernada Alba.

It's playing in KLPAC next week onwards.

xoxo

Small feet

2010-02-19T02:54:00.001Z

My feet must have shrunk.

My shoes have miraculously gotten bigger,

the same shoe I bought and fit perfectly just 2 weeks ago.

I always had small feet,

not that I mind off course.

(best size- always available in sales)

It is however worrying me;

that my shoes are getting larger,

or my feet is getting smaller.

I can't decide which one it is.

but I am content with my small feet...

Benefit of the doubt

2010-02-18T07:25:00.008Z

I got to a point in my life, where I simply can't trust anyone. Definitely influence of being in the legal field.

Golden rule: you CANNOT trust anyone.

Clients tell lawyers their version of the story everyday and the famous line "you can trust me" is used so loosely. In fact this is just an addition to the common misconception that lawyers are liars.Then in court, almost certainly new evidence reveals itself. You then discover the client that you trusted 110% in fact only told you 10% of the REAL story.

Doctors, engineers, teachers, drivers and many others all face this blatant truth.

This isn't just with professional relationships.

You can't trust anyone with anything,

not friends, best friends, lovers, spouses, parents, siblings,

not even priests (don't forget they too are human)

not 100%, not even 80%,

Trust places expectations on something or someone.

Trust raises expectations on something or someone.

You can go on with life telling everybody you trust them,

only to realize the husband who vowed to love you forever, has fallen out of love with you.

only to realize the father you thought was loyal and kind, was in fact screwing your neighbours maid.

only to realize the boyfriend you thought was the one, never felt the same.

only to realize the friends you have, have been back stabbing you.

Trust raises unnecessary expectations. It does no good. All it does is it keeps you in this state of happiness for a short period of time, and when the truth sinks in, it hurts.

When someone says "I trust you", don't get your hopes up. They simply mean they give you the benefit of the doubt.

friends, best friends, parents, siblings, cousins, lovers.

please do not be offended:

I simply don't believe in trust anymore.

It's too much to carry and when it breaks (and it always does)

it hurts bad...

I love you all, not because I don't trust you'll.

I love you all because I simply give you'll the benefit of the doubt that you wont hurt me like I've been hurt before.

So this is my theory :

trust is unnecessary, so don't trust. just give people the benefit of the doubt....

It's been working for me. Also a great way to manage a bad temper.

Take it from a taurus...

toodles!

Under a tuscan sky

2010-02-17T16:29:00.003Z

"they say they built the train tracks between vienna and venice before there was a train that could make the trip. they built it anyway, they knew one day the train would come."

taken from under a tuscan sun...

a quote thats fit for the new look of this page.

I love...

2009-04-18T07:13:00.005+01:00

I love walking through an avenue with trees that let their hands hold each other.

I love the tulips that sit in the beer bottles, they sit by my window.

I love that you love my room.

I love the feeling of the minute before an exam is over.

I love the sound of a classical guitar with French strings.

So tensed, yet so exciting,

Just like the moments I spend with you.

I love doodling on coffee house napkins, leaving my mark behind.

I love chocolates that have a face that smile, they just make me smile.

I love daisies, they are the happiest flowers in the world,

smiling because there is just so much to smile about when there is you.

I love dressing in a suit, putting my hair into a bun.

It puts me in character.

I love that I need my berries and yoghurt in the morning,

and that you always have them at yours.

I love dreaming about things I want to do,

and talking about how they are going to come true,

and I love that you love to dream too.

I love being in photos,

and dressing to make a memory,

especially when they are taken and made by you.

I love listening to a song,

which you know the lyrics to.

And I love it when you try to sing,

you make me want to sing too.

I love reading quotes from people with interesting thoughts.

and I love to quote them in conversations.

I also love that you love to do this too.

I love that I love everything about being with you,

simply because I do.

Into You

2009-03-23T04:21:00.000Z

I like it when the stars fall
into my eyes
when I gaze at them.

I like it when the waves flow
into my ears
when I listen to them.

I like it when a flower blooms
its scent rubs on my nose
when I smell them.

I like it when a strawberry crushes,
squeezing the taste onto my toungue
as I taste them.

I like it when you look at me,
you look into my eyes,
and you see my soul.

I like it when you touch me,
you touch every bit of me,
leaving me only wanting more...

I like it.

Mixed feelings and some change...

2008-08-18T14:32:00.002+01:00

When you break up, it usually means it is time for a change.
I am at a cross road. I am standing there confused as to which direction I should head. So many choices to make, so little time.

There is a path which encompasses the want of a partner. Someone whom wants to care, someone who wants to love, wants to cherish, and most of all who wants to be a witness to my life. Off course, being one from a fresh break up, all these feelings may just be expected from this vulnerable state. But I pause to wonder, if this vulnerability is really just an excuse not to sound so silly. Maybe it is really what my mind is seeking. I am hurt by the break up, and every day I wish it never happened. Every day I wish I could turn back time to when he loved me to bits. Every day I wish I never did anything to hurt him. Every day I wonder if I ever deserved him.

On some days I tell myself I don’t deserve him... and on some days I tell myself, I just have a bruised ego, and I sure as hell am worth more than that, it is him that does not deserve me. It gets me no where except be like a game of ping pong hoping that someone scores a point soon, indicating the choice I make. Right now, it just be nice to have someone, be all that he was to help me get through this vulnerable state.

There is another path which is purely career based. As a lot of you know, I just graduated with a Bachelors in Laws and am going to undertake the Bar Vocational Course this September onwards. Yes, it is pretty much set for me, a career as a Barrister. I like the plan, and I want to be a really good barrister too. Then for those of you who know me well, there is the book to publish, tea house to build, and a glass house, a library, and my zoo. They say when you do really well in your career that is when your personal life becomes pretty much non-existent. Do I really want all that success?

There is the neutral path, which is to lay back and take life a step at a time. I do not like this path, as I love planning ahead. I love dreaming. I have ambitions. I love laying it all down and making it happen. With such a neutral path, I get the temporary distraction. I get only a pinch of paranoia, and I get a chance to get over this break up slowly. I get to make new friends, and enemies. I get to do what I feel like doing without having to think about what he might think. I get to be me. But this path is only a detour. It will eventually leave me to another junction, where I will have to decide between taking either one of the first two paths...

For now, I think I need a bit of change. Mars Chocolate Bar is no longer my favourite chocolate. It is now MnMs with no peanuts. Few more changes will be made. Another major change that will affect a lot of you is my decision to make this blog private for various reasons. I have decided to make it more personal. As a few of you know, I wrote a chic lit, and I wanted to publish it. It was supposed to be for him. I decided I am not going to publish it, but for those of you whom have been long awaited it, I am going to post chapters up slowly, so please do not pester me for not wanting to publish. This is the rough manuscript. Looking up some copyright laws before it goes up to play safe.

Some of you will be personally invited to be a reader of this blog. For those of you who feel that I may not be sending you an invite, and want to be a reader of this blog, do drop a comment on this post, along with an email add (preferably gmail ) and I will see to it, that you get one. This blog will go private sometime early September. Invites will be sent when that happens. Thank you all for reading my blog. I hope it has in some way changed you.

It is time for a change!

Moving on

2008-06-08T07:33:00.000+01:00

I finally finished my law degree.
Im home. (or at least it's where my family lives)

It has been so different.
The place looks the same.
Nothings changed.
the billboard still parading the event that took place 3 years ago,
the mamak man still making food in the heat,
the forces still taking bribes,
the heat, still ridiculous.

But now I feel something missing.
Has the world moved on without me?
Did the tiger roar when everyone was sleeping?

Why wont he fight for me?

The one that makes me happy,
now chooses to keep his distance,
and draw his own path on the ground.

Gone are the days when he went out of the way, just to see me.
gone are the days when he did not care about anything, unless if it was about me.
gone are those days....

now everything is different...

and I have to make a decision as to what it is I want to do about it.

As of today, I will return to the UK in exactly 3 months. Yes I booked my ticket today.
I cant stop thinking whether I am worth the fight? coz I would have given up a long time ago....

I cant decide. I dont want to.

sigh.

Tattoo

2008-01-17T06:11:00.000Z

You are like a tattoo,
I let you in my life,
and the love hurts,
and its impossible to erase you.

and the only way possible,
will hurt me a million times more.

So Ill keep the tattoo and spare the hurt.

I'll do it for you

2008-01-17T06:03:00.000Z

I feel alone, in a room filled with people.
This feeling of content that I cant seem to locate.
Being away from you,
just makes everything seem worse.

Deep under the moonlit sky,
I dream of kissing you,
the blackened trees shadows
the mystery of the night.

who am I kidding?

you aren't by my side....
though I wish you were...

everday longing to see you fall in love with me,
all over again...

why wont you fall in love with me?
why do you keep doing the things
that you know will drive me away?
why baby, why?

you say you love me...
but baby, do you really mean it?
do you know what love is to me?

what is love to you baby?
is it just a foolish game lovers play?
or is it something with much more responsibility.

I need you to know what you want.
Let's not play pretend.
It's only gonna end up hurting somebody.

I want you.
I want you to know that I want you,
and I wanna love you the way you deserve to be loved.

Im sorry for my shortcomings,
and to make up for it,

I promise to love you,
and to me, the more I fall for you,
the more it helps me become a stronger person.

and baby, I'll do it for you..

This I promise you.

Music speaks and no one listens

2008-01-07T22:00:00.000Z

I listen to music,
and it speaks to me.
It's telling me a mix of things,
to confuse me.

Music is good.
depending on my mood.
but today it keeps speaking,
of something that I am seeking.

How come it's unfamiliar?
The same song, oh so peculiar?
It seems clear but yet there is depth,
in the meaning it longs to set.

Music speaks and no one listens...
Just like me speaking,
with no listeners...
But you puzzle me as you listen,
but you might just be hearing,
just like the other...

No one listens...

Christmas will be different

2007-12-10T19:35:00.000Z

It is the christmas season...
what should I expect?

Sometimes I wonder if this year, christmas is going to be different.
Being in a different continent,
different environment,
different friends,
different hopes and expectations,
different ways of living,
different ideals,
different desires,
different goals,

everything so different...
different.

If I was a guardian angel,
I'd send you your one wish,
and that is for me to have a good christmas this year.
The same wish you wish for every year.

This year is gonna be so different,
first christmas without you in a long time...
I dont know what to expect,
maybe I should not expect anything,
that way I might just enjoy every bit that is gonna take place...

But love,
Things are so different for me this christmas,
So maybe it's this year, that will make a difference....

a difference for me,
a difference for you,
and a difference for us...

but maybe not...
I am sorry I cant be there this christmas...

My heart still pains for you everyday...
and I am waiting to be in you arms again,
if you give me that chance....

Im hoping for a different christmas this year...

(oh gosh... Here I go expecting too much again.)

to you my love,
always and forever...

Tulips

2007-11-14T20:37:00.000Z

I feel like picking tulips today.

It is an amusing feeling. I dont know why I want to do so, but that is what I want to do.

I felt like this since I got your morning message today. The message was unexpected, completely appreciated. It made me feel so much better. I don’t know what it is. Maybe it is me knowing that you are thinking about me. It is a truly amazing feeling to hear from you.

One message, and it is enough to make my day. You always do the exact right thing and you put a smile on my face for the rest of the day. It is like my body is attracted to you. Every time it sees you, my face muscles weaken and It forces a smile. My mind is at peace when I hear from you. Desire and passion running through my mind and it craves for you, wanting every bit of you.

The soul would have no rainbow if the eyes had no tears. You embrace my soul each morning, and touch my soul at night, and today I feel like picking tulips.

Pink tulips.

Hmmmm.

Jitters

2007-09-04T06:02:00.000+01:00

11 days more in Malaysia.
Im leaving on a jet plane,
and I dont know when I'll be back again.

I'm starting to feel like I'm leaving behind a huge part of me.
It's a lonesome feeling....
I feel suffocated. I can't Breathe.
My life flashes back at me from time to time.

I don't know what's happening to me.
This is me.
The girl who was, and still is so excited about leaving for the UK.
I'm Nervous.

My bags are already fully packed,
yet I feel like I still have so much more to pack...

Why, oh why am I feeling like this???

Jitters....

Baby,
kiss me and smile for me,
tell me tht you'll wait for me,
hold me like you'll never let me know....

Its so painful, the process of leaving.

Jitters...

The concept of equality is rigid

2007-09-02T06:22:00.000+01:00

I've always worked hard for the things I really want.

And I get them...
At least I am satisfied with the results of determination.

I am determined.
Always have been...
I've felt the stress of determination,
the pressure of a willing mind,
and bore a positive attitude.

I've achieved to this end quite a bit.
because like I said,
I've always worked hard for the things I really want.

But now I wonder, If it is all worth it?
If it was ever fair at all?

So many people,
different limitations,
different amount of hard work,
yet all achieve the same outcome...

Why are we made this way?
Some to understand in just a day,
and someone to never understand at all.

Why do people fight for equality,
when no one is equal?

Is equality measured generally?
and if so, then why bother to measure,
yet alone to speak of it?

Life on its own is unequal to everyone.
The only thing that we all have in common,
is the fact that we all dont know when our life will end,
we can only hope, pray, and wonder.
But we will never know for sure....

I am 21 years old,
and I am still determined to do what I want to do.

But I still stop and wonder every now and then,
why I am so determined when the outcome is similar for everyone...

The concept of equality remains rigid.

Once upon a time, you used to smile....

2007-08-11T07:45:00.000+01:00

Once upon a time, you used to smile.
Everytime...

Everytime you saw me,
You would have a glow in your face;
like a fresh light bulb telling the world it exists.
Everytime...

Everytime you spoke to me,
You would grin from ear to ear,
while your eyes watched me admiringly;
as if I were an object of perfection,
and as if we were having the perfect conversation.

Everytime you touched me,
My nerves would tremble,
My thoughts go blank,
and I am lost in your world;
Everytime...

Everytime you kissed me,
you made me feel like you wanted me,
that you needed me,
while butterflies kicked inside of me,
Everytime.
I secretly wanted you too...

Everytime I squelled at something cute,
you would quietly let out a laugh,
that told me that you adored me;
like a new kitten that you would wanna keep...

Everytime you hugged me,
I felt a sense of belonging,
and I just want to stay in your arms;
In you arms, I feel safe...

Everytime you said you loved me,
I knew you meant it.
and how I wish you knew,
that I was feeling the same way about you.
Everytime...

Once upon a time, you used to smile,
Everytime...

Now, its different.
Everytime, is once upon a time.

Everytime you see me,
It feels like Im just an obligation,
an obligation that you are forced to please.

Everytime you speak to me,
It feels like you are tired of talking,
then we slowly start arguing,
both of us like bad lawyers,
trying to prove a pointless case...

Everytime you touch me,
you want more of me,
like a simple touch on the hand would mean nothing.
You would need so much of me,
to feel me...

Everytime you kiss me,
its like you want to be in a moment,
a moment that I just cant feel anymore...

When I squelled at something cute,
you told me to grow up,
as if it was something you always hated in me.

Everytime I say I love you,
I wonder if you even hear me;
When I say I need you,
I wonder if you believe me;

Everytime, everytime...

Once upon a time, you used to smile,
Everytime...

Excited

2007-08-03T14:20:00.000+01:00

Hello Bloggers...

I apologise for not posting anything for the past 8 months. Truth is I just haven't been inspired. It's probably due to the stress of final exams which was in June.

I have completed Year 2 of my law degree at HELP University. Now I am off to the University of Liverpool, UK, for my final year. I leave on September 13th, so friends, come chill with me before I leave.

While waiting for my results, I took part in a Mooting Competition with my partner, Christine Ellis. We put in alot of effort in to win this competition, and we did. We won a months internship with Messrs Skrine & Co (biggest law firm in Msia), RM 500 each, invidual trophies, and names on the Rolling trophy.

After the Mooting Competition, I did a 3 week attachment at Messrs Bodipalar Ponnudurai Nathan, advocates, and solicitors (BPN). My master here was Mr Anand Ponnudurai, himself. He is a well known lawyer who specializes in Industrial Relations, which is the area of law I want to major in. My stint at BPN was the best attachment ever. I learnt so much, I was treated with respect, given challenging work to do, and the people at BPN were just the friendliest bunch of people I have ever met. BPN rocks!

At this moment, I am doing the one month attachment I won with Skrine. I've only been there for 3 days. Thus I shall reserve my comments for a later date.

I am so excited about going to UK. So many preps, ie. things to get, people to catch up with, certs to pick up, organise finances,etc.

I just ordered a dell laptop. It's Red in colour!!

I got new sports shoes, and court shoes too!!

hmmmm.... so many more thigns to get.

Will keep you guys updated with more posts.

Thanks for reading my blog!

Love you guys so much!!!

Art of the silent drum

2006-12-16T17:30:00.000Z

Art of the silent drum

My head is thumping.
I feel the adrenaline rush.
A mixed feeling of foolishness, and happiness.

They treat me like a gem,
why did I ever step on their polished shoes?
or say that they had piled up issues?

Now I feel like an empty tin can,
empty vessels make more noise.
why cant, I sit and learn the art of the silent drum,
and live my life with more dignity and grace?

Wind silently speaks,
and hushes the thumping.

hush hush....
time to sleep.

Love and loss

2006-12-07T16:26:00.000Z

Love and loss

Last night was a very painful night. Something happened, and I realised there really is no such thing as fairy tale relationship. You can believe all you want, but then one day reality strikes and you find your prince charming turned into an ugly old frog, the evil witch puts curse on you, and will probably rule the world at the end of the story. No more happy endings.

I want to share two things with all my readers.

First is the song "The Book of Love" by Peter Gabriel.
This song, is so sweet, yet it is no fairy tale. Its a reality check.Those of you who undestand the words to this song, you should love someone this way, not by the "book of love".

I love this song. It is also played in Shall We Dance.

-The Book of Love-
by Peter Gabriel

The book of love is long and boring
No one can lift the damn thing
It's full of charts and facts and figures and instructions for dancing
But I, I love it when you read to me
And you
You can read me anything
The book of love has music in it
In fact that's where music comes from
Some of it is just transcendental
Some of it is just really dumb
But I, I love it when you sing to me
And you
You can sing me anything
The book of love is long and boring
And written very long ago
It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes
And things we're all too young to know
But I, I love it when you give me things
And you
You ought to give me wedding rings
And I, I love it when you give me things
And you
You ought to give me wedding rings
And I, I love it when you give me things
And you
You ought to give me wedding rings
You ought to give me wedding rings

-end-

Second is the poem "One Art" written by Elizabeth Bishop.
This is a poem about loss, and how to deal with it. I like the way she writes, and I agree with her.

-One Art-
by Elizabeth Bishop

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

--Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied.  It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

-end-

I hope all of you who are reading this can learn something from it. Even if you dont, life is full experiences, it will teach you at the right time.
Keep loving, and keep it real.

Breathless at 3 am

2006-12-02T22:30:00.000Z

Breathless at 3 am

This morning, I woke up with a really bad asthma attack. It felt like I was fighting to live. I was wheezing so heavily, and my chest felt so tight. I could hardly think straight. I have not had this bad of an attack since I was 12 years old. My mother rushed me to Pantai, so she could get me on a nebulizer fast so I can breathe.

Lucky for me, Pantai's emergency ward was empty, so I was attended to as soon as I got there. After taking my blood pressure, I was quickly given the nebulizer. While I lay there, breathing through the nebulizer, I was reminded of how scared I used to get when I had attack. This was when I was a child, and did not know any better. I used to be so worried that I would not survive. That I would stop breathing before any help was given to me. Everytime I had an attack I used to think I was a step closer to death, or like a cat, was a losing my nine lives so easily.

Asthma can be a really scary thing especially if you know very little about it. Apparently it is impossible for an asthmatic to die of an asthama attack today, because once just a litte medicine has gone into your body, you are protected. There is not a single small risk of you dying once this happens. You might suffer quite a bit due to difficulties breathing, but you wont die. Now thats a real relief. I still wonder, how they can guarantee you that your life is protected with heavy dosed drugs. Guess that might be a reason why, I never stepped into the science stream. Science is about proof, but I believe in exceptions.

Well anyways, I should get some rest now. Will keep you guys posted with my quiries of life and the things that happen around me. Thank you for bookmarking my blog.

The power of contacts

2006-11-06T04:54:00.000Z

The power of contacts

It is amazing what you can achieve with contacts. You could get away with murder by just knowing the right people. In a working environment, being in the good books of your boss, actually has many advantages. On the negative end, it really annoys others who are just doing their job the right way(which is the harder way).

The truth is, when you have contacts like that, people just hate you. You could look at it as if it were jealousy. In my working environment I learnt that although people bitch about the person who sucks up to the boss, that person actually benefits more. Personally I hate the next person who polishes the boss' shoe, but if you look at it in a wider perspective, you find that, its life. That's how this world operates. They always say study smart not hard. It works the same way with work I guess. Work smart not hard. Suprisingly it actually takes you to the top.

A little inside on my situation at work. The boss they all bitch about who is such a big suck up, always get a phone call 10 minutes before the district manager plans to walk in for a "surprise checklist". That gives us more than enough time, to make sure everything is in order, expiry dates are checked and updated, and the outlet is sparkling. In the end of the day, the suck up gets promoted right to the top, with a better job, and a higher paying salary. Leaving the rest of us, hardworkers, frustrated at how easily it was for the suck up to climb the ladder.

Guess that's life though. You got to want to get to the top, and play your role smart, not hard. No I am not encouraging anyone to suck up to their boss, but merely stating a point that you only get places when you know the right people.

The next time, you get a chance to meet some new people. Take that opportunity, you never know what they could do for you. Haha. Sounds like using people.

Well, that's life, be smart! Get used it!

Sexy smell of the air

2006-11-05T03:36:00.000Z

Sexy smell of the air

I love damp smell of the air once the rain has stopped.
It is unique, and sensual.

It is bad for hair texture, as it makes hair dry,
but yet the smell is so attractive.
Makes me feel so sexy, and confident,
ready to take on life's challenge,
like there is no one in the world to compete with,
but me...

At the end of a day,
I just want to lay back,
close my eyes,
and smell the damp air.

It is a cosy feeling.
and also stress free...

So little time

2006-11-04T05:30:00.000Z

So little time

Its been a long time.

I am so tired.
So much to do, so little time.

Mooting bundle to be done.
Tort assignment articles to be read.
Opinion writing presentation to prepare for.
Cases to be summarised for class.
Tort and Land Essays due next week.
Sale of Goods chapters to be read up.
World of Coffee and World of Tea training to attend.
Modelling pictures to be printed for portfolio.
Birthday Presents to shop for.
Black court shoes to be bought.
Friends to catch up with.
Car to be washed.
Tuition scheduale to be fixed.
Job interview to prepare for next week.
Register HOTLINK account.
Get roadtax done.
Check Ralph's car tinted windows.
Organise party and find a venue.

Oh yes, Dont forget to eat lunch again!!

Im so tired...

Just wish there was one more day in a week.
I want to run into your arms, and sleep there, and wake up fresh.

Oh baby, thanks for being here for me, even when I dont make much time for anything other than myself. I love you so much.

Im so blessed to have you in my life.

Happy Anniversary love!!

muacksies.

The emotional hang over

2006-09-10T03:30:00.000+01:00

The emotional hang over

Friday night:

Good Show.
Hard Drinks.
Instant Headache....

To many things on my mind.

I keep thinking of how much you love me,
and its just killing me.
I dont think you go all out for me as you used to.
Is it because of change?
Have I changed?

I still send you emails, write you letters, send you smiles, hugs and kisses.
I sms you every other time I can.
I write about you, for you all the time.
I still buy roses everyday to put in that vase you got me, eventhough Im broke.
I argue with you, because I miss you and I love you.

Have you forgotten how much I love you?
Did I do something to make you turn away?
Why cant I see the guy I used to know?
Was it that you did too much for me?
That it hurt your household and lost yourself?

Maybe I just dont deserve your love...

But I miss you and I love you
and I am still here waiting for you to run back into my arms.

Saturday morning:

Hang Over.

Happiness as a word

2006-08-18T01:53:00.000+01:00

Happiness as a word

Yes, the purple cat went silent for a while now. She has been laying low, and was little down, but she is much better now.

I am now working at Coffee Bean Sri Hartamas as a barister, and work has been good. I really enjoy the company of my team members, and random regular customer chats which only last for about 3-5 minutes, but nonetheless, its nice. Guess, Its just in my nature. I love socialising. I love working with people. The Food and Beverage line (FNB) is a very interesting line to work in especially since I am studying nothing closely related to it, law. However, with a few customer complaints and office politics that did occur, I realised that the field I am in, law, could perhaps be used in the FNB line,for the better benefit of the company. Maybe in the future, I would consider owning an outlet of my own, as well as taking care of the legal aspects involved in it. It be fun, since I really enjoy my job.

Anyways, I thought I'd blog you'll a question posted by one of our regular customers today, which was, what is the meaning of the word happiness?

It seems like a rather easy word to not know the exact meaning. However, although there is a dictionary meaning to the word, I believe that happiness is a perspective and that it would differ from one person to the other. It was nice hearing my team members say what happiness meant to them. For some strange reason, sharing opinions of this word really made us all feel the word.

So here I am posting this question to youll. Share with us, what happiness means to you?

and ill tell you mine, in the next post...

till then..

The truth hurts

2006-07-29T04:30:00.000+01:00

The truth hurts

To you who wanted to hear me say this

I have changed for the worse.
I cant do anything right anymore.
Im paranoid.
Im insecure.
Im useless and worthless.
Im selfish.
Im horrible.
Im impatient.
I like to be in control.
I cant say anything without hurting others.
I bitch about you behind your back.
I hate my life at the moment.
Dont try and save me, cause Ive drowned.

I have changed for the worse,
and I just cant do anything about it....

It hurts to know I really am so bad.

Have you ever thought that it might have been you instead of me.

Ive said it!

Im weak, and I will not fight.
Im human too, and there is only so much critics I can take, and then I explode...

Risk

2006-07-16T18:43:00.000+01:00

Risk

My life is in your hands
Whatever you do, I trust you
So take me with you
and do not worry, for with you I will be safe

Take me to the moon and back
Lets float away from gravity
Take me to the deep end of the ocean
Lets dive to the lowest point

For once, take it,
Just take the risk,
take me,
and I will come...

Silent Whispers of the Wind

2006-07-15T06:44:00.000+01:00

Silent Whispers of the Wind

The silent whisper of the wind clouds the night
with voices of the past
Reminding me of the night of passion,
the night of romance, and of pleasure...

Red is the colour of the sky at dusk
warm lenghts of brightness
then slowly changing its skin to a softer tone
So we feel like we are on esctacy
and then slowly dying with sheer pleasure
again and again until the night is over.

We hear just silent whispers of the wind,
and the rest is left to two.

Ladybird Award

2006-07-11T18:50:00.000+01:00

Ladybird Award

About a month ago, I had a competition on my blog for a ladybird award. The title of the blog post was 'If all ladybrids were females, then how do they have babies?'. First and foremost I apologise for the delay of the results. I had to sort a few issues with the owner of the ladybird image and the judges who took ages to get back to me with the results.

A big thank you to the 'LB man' for letting me host his ladybird image as an award and to sandman, chitts, firelady, matthias, and riskydriver, thank you so much for taking your time to judge this competition.

So for the moment we all been waiting for.

The winner of the lady bird award goes to....

*drumroll*

Michael Lancelot Rodrigues

with his idea as to how ladybrids have babies

'lolz... herm.. there is a ladybug stork.. who delivers little baby ladybugs to ladybug parents...'

The lady bird award is hosted on my blog and placed right hand task bar with Michael's name on it. It will remain there till another award is won on my blog.

To all the other contestants, thank you so much for participating. All your entries had a little wit in it, and that puts a smile on my face. However there can only be one winner, and here the judges voted that Michael gets the award. Dont worry, there will be loads of competitions on my blog in the future, dont give up, you might win it next time.

Love yall bloggers. Thanks for your continuing visits to my blog.

Peace out.

Space

2006-07-10T19:17:00.000+01:00

Space

It is funny how we all revolve around space, time for ourselves, shutting the whole world out just for self content. I hate this word SPACE... I guess to me, when someone is given space, most of time they take advantage on it, in a selfish sense only worrying about him/herself, while taking advantage on it, may sit and hurt others who love you, and have sacrificed everything for you.

Space allows people to think about what they have done, but how many people really do this? Space lets us a person learn to appreciate what they are missing, but at the same time, they learn what they are not missing. Space is just a lie. A lie to get out of a mess you put yourself in, whether it is a physical or mental. Most of the time, its because you are bored, and you need to take a look at another aspect which you can find a wee bit more interesting about a person.

Space is for lonely people. If you are open, you will agree with me, that space is just delayed truth. If there isnt anything to hide, then why do you need space? If you want to look at the bigger picture, then step back. Have you ever realised why the key to that thing to separate words is called SPACE bar? That key deletes the physical and mental connection between the two words. The sentence sounds good, but most of the time one or the other word can be replaced with another word. So in other words, space is like fishing in the sea. Seeing if there is someone out there more compatible for you.

If my theory above is right, then people shouldnt fill others with lies like they love them so much that they will never let them go, they will never do anything to hurt you, and never lie to you, then after saying that go behind your back to what they call SPACE or a time out. To me, that itself is a lie. Space divides people. If you are in a relationship and you are unhappy, then break up, space will not help it, it just makes things worse most of the time. If you want to take this a step further, SPACE and BREAK UP really is the same thing. Fishing in the sea, moving on!

I am for a relationship without Space, if you agree with me then live it and be happy.

Forget about love, if you are lying. Keeping the truth away is the absense of truth. The absense of truth is lie.

To fall in love, I believe in truth from the introduction itself.

"There are no intentions here, so relax and explore your hearts content. Have no expectations coz when a person with no intentions meets a person with no expectations, the introduction couldnt be more honest and pure." - Saira Mohan

After that, build your relationship upon that, HONESTY. Speaking from being in a relationship for 2 and a half years. That is the thing that will keep you strong.

p/s: all this is just my opinion, so you dont have to agree with it.

An acceptable excuse

2006-07-03T04:45:00.000+01:00

An acceptable excuse

I got a part in the musical 'Les Miserables', to which I am 'Cossette' and 'Young Cossette'. I am really happy I got a part because it kinda gives me hope that my dreams of doing performing arts may still be alive. My voice sounds adultish, yet sweet (thats what this lady who trained me said) and shaky at high notes. I still am not sure how I landed this role. My biggest worry now, is having to portray a voice of a 7 year old.

Getting this part, to me is a miracle, considering the fact that I was not in a position to sing on the day of auditions. I was upset with someone (you) the day before. So upset that I drank, got myself a little tipsy, and woke up the next day sounding like a bull frog. Note to everyone out there, day before audition, dont drink. Warming up in the morning was a real killer. Firstly, because the average human being's voice is only warmed up by noon everyday. Secondly, having alcohol in your system, gets your voice warmed up hours after the average. Auditions was at 10 am. I was so upset, I remember tearing 30 minutes before it began. Thankfully, I did a million scales of warming up, that brought my voice back up very close to its best. For some reason, I did not sound too bad at the audition, and I landed the role I wanted.

Yet, something still annoyed me. The fact that you werent there for me. You knew how important this audition meant to me, and you just made me upset, that I drank, and made it difficult for me to audition, and the next day, you weren't even there to support me.

I collected my results on the same day. You promised you'd be there, but you were not. However, I did fairly well and I should be proud of myself, instead of fretting the fact that you were not there.

Right now, you make me sound so paranoid. After everyone reads this, they are gonna think I am super paranoid!

Sometimes there just isnt any acceptable excuses but saying 'I am sorry'.

Flame of love

2006-06-25T16:45:00.000+01:00

Flame of love

The flame of love is slowly dying
That usually is the case
But I thought that we would be different
In our actions and in words

To keep the flame burning
with a lot of passion and caring
So do you still love me?
Your heart, am I still the key?

The phone has stopped ringing
Candle night dinners are over
Love, you have stopped singing
to me with love, your lover.

To me, you seem defensive,
I cannot touch your phone
You have thrown away the curfew
truth is, now I feel alone.

What is it you need from me
To keep the love alive?
What is it that I must give?
For you to realise

How much I love you
and want you to be mine.
I still dont understand
How you try and balance time

Between me and your family,
Yet I still dont feel my share.
It seems more like first it is family,
which is very admirable

Then it comes your friends,
After which I will arrive.
I only say this now,
Because you plan with them.

What happen to you planning?
Romantic candle lights
A midnight moonlit walk
It was something that you loved.

But now, the flame is dying.
My love, why are you flying,
Away from your lover,
who is sinking a step lower.

Are we really like most couples,
Quickly fading the romance.
No more burning madness,
I still want the chance

To hold your hands
To kiss your lips,
And still know that you are there,
Instead of no where.

The flame of love is slowly dying,
That usually is the case
But love I want to fight it,
And keep the flame burning.

50 Absolutely Useless Facts about the Purple Cat

2006-06-15T03:25:00.000+01:00

50 Absolutely Useless Facts about the Purple Cat

1. Loves all animals, especially cats
2. Knows your number after one phone call
3. Drinks Green Tea first thing in the morning
4. Drives a white Mazda Lantis
5. Wants to meet Andrew Llyod Webber
6. Won a Nokia Phone for looking pretty
7. Has a migrain after passing a person with expensive perfume
8. Only drinks tomato juice with salt in it.
9. Hates raisins
10. Talks a wee bit too much
11. Wants to drive a Mini Cooper
12. Will not try exotic food eg. snake
13. Has a totally cutomised purple colour tennis racquet.
14. Does not learn languages well ( I know english, and i'll stick with it)
15. Likes watching the rain while eating ice cream.
16. Watches only the news channels in the morning.
17. Loves being in photos.
18. Is tiny. Only 35 kilos.
19. Has perfect eye sight.
20. Knows how to play flamenco on the guitar.
21. Good with people.
22. Brushes teeth with a purple or pink tooth brush.
23. Thinks this blog is the best blog in the world.
24. Watched CATS the musical over 80 times. I think its 84.
25. Has an opera singer as a neighbour.
26. Buys a flower every week.
27. Loves listening to jazz.
28. Wears a silver ring on a finger, and never ever takes it out.
29. Dreams to be on a shampoo bottle.
30. Once forgives a person, cant remember the fault the next day.
31. Most of the time, out of credit.
32. Prefers Milk Chocolate.
33. Intends to own a crocodile as a pet.
34. Likes the feeling of being in a fast car.
35. Loves Sorbet ice creams.
36. Knows that Coffee Bean is better than Starbucks.
37. Is a perfectionist.
38. Wants to go bold, just for the thrills.
39. Terribly afraid of fire.
40. Has more guy friends, than girl friends.
41. Loves watching the stars at night, and then the sunrise.
42. Loves taking evening walks.
43. Does not like politics.
44. Sees herself as a famous opera singer having tea with Andrew Lloyd Webber in ten years.
45. Is very, very organised.
46. Wants to be a manager of an F&B outlet.
47. Wants to study Pet Grooming.
48. Wants to be an Ambassador for U2.
49. Played guitar with Daniel Jones.
50. Hates it when people change her plans.

Wish list of ifs

2006-05-15T17:45:00.000+01:00

Wish list of ifs

If there was a lake,
Ill swim with you
If there was an open sky,
Ill watch birds with you
If I had more shoes,
Ill walk longer with you
If I had handcuffs,
Ill cuff myself to you
If I was a stranger
Ill walk miles till I find you
If I had one wish
It be to stay with you,
forever...

thats if and only if,
my wish list of ifs comes true.

If all ladybrids were females, then how do they have babies?

2006-05-12T19:15:00.000+01:00

If all ladybrids were females, then how do they have babies?

It never before came across my mind how a ladybug (ladybird) got its name. If they are all ladies, then how do they reproduce?

Before anyone makes any smart comments, let me just say that I am not and have never been a science stream student. I have always been with the arts stream.(hmmm... I can just imagine, all those who know me, would be thinking that I am joking as my mother is a Biology teacher). But note, I really am not a science student, and you will realize why when you read below.

Here is how I think ladybugs have babies.

Well, ladybugs are such pretty creatures. So I would think that they obviously pamper themselves, just like us humans in a rose petal bubble baths. Theirs would most likely be an aphids bubble bath. (Aphids are green insects that eat plants. Aphids are what ladybugs eat.) So yea, as I was saying, they pamper themselves so well... and in that luxury experience the utmost pleasure which is so divine of the soothing bath. That is when they decide to go lay some eggs, and let more ladybugs experience those divine baths.

Alright. Now I know I sound real juvenile and as you should already know, I just made up that bit of bullshit. Yup, I just read it off the internet on how ladybugs actually have babies. However that is not what is important for this blog.

I am giving out a ladybug award to the person who comes up with the most creative and imaginative explanation to how ladybugs got its name, and how they have babies. It must be totally what you think, and try not to think too scientifically. Just put your answers in by adding a comment to this post. Remember it does not have to be the right answer. I am looking for imagination. The award will be placed in this blog and will have the winners name on it.

This is what the award looks like.

Isnt it an adorable award? hehehe... Get your thinking caps working, and show me some creativity!

The closing date is on the 26th of May.

Toodles

RSVP no more

2006-04-26T17:28:00.000+01:00

RSVP no more

It is so frustrating really, how the modern generation reply to invitations. They just dont reply and expect you to know if they are coming or not. No such thing as RSVP anymore. It so sucks, especially when you need to organise things like buy movie tickets or cater food.

Sheesh, I may sound old fashion, but we CANNOT ignore the RSVP sign on a card. Its not there for decoration. Its a sign that the person who invited you needs to do something that requires them to know the amount of people attending.

So next time you get an invite with RSVP on it, reply!

Stress till I here the sound of the harmonica

2006-04-26T01:48:00.000+01:00

Stress till I here the sound of the harmonica

My exams are in 26 days time. I am not ready!!! I feel jittery, and unhappy of the fact that there is so much to remember. When I read, I know what is happening. But when I try to recall, oh man, my mind goes blank. I believe this is just stress. AAAHHHHHHH... IM losing time. The clock is ticking. (tick. tock. tick. tock.)

My birthday is in 3 days time, this friday, and I want to release my stress over a movie with my mates. It just sucks cause, most people just turn the offer down, cause of exams. Whats 3 hours for a friend do to your study plans? So much for friends. I seriously dont get it. Most of the time I go out of the way, even when IM busy for yall, and yall cant even give me 3 hours? (this goes to those who turned me down with reason being exams). Talk about being kiasu. Kiasuism + friends = incomplete solution. You just cant have both!

I hear there is a band from uni having a gig on the same night, and people are going for that. Whats the big idea? You waste more time at a gig than at a movie, a movie with your friend on her birthday. AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH... Im being depressive.

(Dont mind me, just pissed off. For those of you who said yes to the movie, thank you guys so much. It means the world to me really!! Thats all I want on my birthday, true friends!)

In all, the stress and mess, I still hear the sound of the harmonica coming from the living room where daddy is sitting, playing his brand new Hohner, Big Valley. This puts a smile to my face. Mummy, my siblings and I, got daddy a harmonica for his birthday. I was really worried he would not appreciate it much, but I must say, I know know he does indeed appreciate it. He plays so well. He can actually play it! Note, I emphasize the fact that he can really play, cause most of us own a harmonica in our houses, but no one really knows how to play, but daddy he can not just play it, but he plays it really well. He is re-living the old days where he used to play a hohner really well. Nice to hear the sound of the harmonica again. It shows you his appreciation.

In all the stress, appreciation for the smallest things manages to put a smile on your face.

Love you dad. Keep on playing. It motivates me. *wink*

Bunny has been murdered!

2006-04-20T18:50:00.000+01:00

Bunny has been murdered!

SOMEONE EXECUTED MY BUNNYS HEAD.

*sob*

Bunny came to me as a gift from a friend studying in New Zealand for Easter (thank you Ameet). Measured at about 14 cm tall, stood this bunny in a blue cloak branded Cadbury Dairy Milk Chocolate, smiling at everybody who stood to admire it (although it knew that his dying day was to come, when someone decides to eat it up).

It arrived on April 17th, and since it was a monday, I decided to wait for the weekend to snap some pictures of it, and send a thank you card to the sender (you see, my sister holds the camera, whose only back on the weekends). Till then, I was gonna bond with the bunny. Every day I open the fridge to see it smiling at me. It was so so adorable.

But then came, April 20th. I opened the fridge in the morning only to find the body of my bunny lying there with its head no where in sight.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
SOMEONE MURDERED BUNNY AND STOLE ITS HEAD!

*snif* No more smiling bunny. No more 14 cm tall bunny(now only 8 cm tall). No bunny to take a picture to make a thank you card. Alls left is its body.

*sob*

Oh poor bunny, may you rest in peace.

Just you wait murderer, whoever you are, ill find you.
Youll regret you ever laid eyes on MY Bunny.

(frustrations of living in a house with so many people)

Cutlets

2006-04-17T03:35:00.000+01:00

Cutlets

Some guys like to dive right into a relationship
just like raw meat.
Some guys like to take time, and get to know you slowly
just like boiling a potato, then peeling it, then mincing it.

But some guys like a bit of both
You need a bit of meat, and the bolied, peeled and minced potatoes
So I call them cutlets...

p/s: dont take it this too seriously, this is just my cutlet theory.

Sacrifice

2006-04-07T03:13:00.000+01:00

Sacrifice

The term "do what makes you happy" is seriously flawed. Complete bullshit, if you dont have money at the end of the day. It is what you want to believe, what you choose to feel.

The only thing thats real, is the sacrifice people make for the benefit of others. Sacrificing happiness to help someone out. Sacrificing dreams, just so you dont become a burden to anyone. Sacrifising time, so you dont piss people off. True love, is a sacrifice.

Sometimes, people throw the weirdest things at you. Sometimes you end up in a position, that make u lose your reputation, and image. I have made someone so upset at me, that they have lost all respect for me. On the facts of this situation, I could be so angry and not forgive anyone like that, but its different. This person is different. This person will play a big part in my life later on, and I hate having made her upset. I dont know how to say sorry, and even if I did say sorry, I wouldnt be too sure about what I am saying sorry for. But, I am truly sorry for causing hurt to her, and I just wish there was an easier way to get that across to her.

I just wanted to hear an explanation, not from a thrid party. Im still searching for a way.

True love is a sacrifice. This also means, sacrifising your wants, for the happiness of others. Sacrifice for me at this point, is drowning my pride, and finding a way to reconcile.

The season of lent is about sacrifice and reconciliation. I hope and pray, that I will continue to grow in that light.

Show me love

2006-03-27T03:29:00.000+01:00

Show me love

I have been so messed up lately. I just keep doing everything wrong. I know I hurt you baby, by having so little time. On my way to class this morning, an old song was playing on the radio, and it just got to me. It is how I feel. Its a good feeling!

Show Me Love by Robyn

Yeah, yeah, yeah...
Always been told that I've got too much pride
Too independant to have you by my side
But my heart said all of you will see
Just wont live for someone until hell live for me
Never thought I would find love so sweet
Never thought I would meet someone like you
Well now Ive found you and Ill tell you no lie
This love Ive got for you
Could take me round the world
Now show me love
Show me love, show me life
Baby show me what its all about
Youre the one that I ever needed
Show me love and what its all about, alright
Dont waste this love I wanna give it to you
Tell me what you got, show me what you can do
Show me love, show me everything
I know youve got potential
So baby let me in and show me love
Show me love, show me life (alright)
Baby show me what its all about
Youre the only one that I ever needed (show me love)
Show me love and what its all about, alright
Show me love, show me life
Baby show me what its all about
Youre the one that I ever needed
Show me love and what its all about, alright
Show me love baby
Show me everything youve got and show me life
Show me love baby
Show me everything and what its all about
Youre the one, the only one I ever needed
Show me love and what its all about, alright
Ill love you
Ill miss you
Ill make sure
Everything will be alrightIll give you my heart if you just give me love
Every day and every night
Show me love, show me life (alright)
Baby show me what its all about
Youre the one that I ever needed
Show me love and what its all about, alright
Show me love, show me life (alright)
Baby show me what it's all about
Youre the one that I ever needed
Show me love and what its all about, alright

Its exactlly what I want. show me love...

Can the worst get any worse?

2006-02-28T23:15:00.000Z

Can the worst get any worse?

I always find it hard to believe, that things can just get worse when something bad takes place. Why do we have to go through multiple things when we are stressed out?

When I am having a bad day, things just never get any better. Sometimes I get this feeling that I am this walking stick of bad luck. Must all bad things come at one go?

Does this happen to everyone, or is it just me the unfortunate purple cat?
Can the worst get any worse?

Watching the stars

2006-02-24T01:15:00.000Z

Watching the stars

Let us lie down and watch the stars together.
I remember the time you lay beside me,
and told me the tale of the stars.
I never understood the picture,
so you drew it out for me.

Its my life that you drew out
all the treasured moments were with you.

I cant seem to understand the picture now
Im looking hard and close.
so hard, but I cant understand why
I feel your spirit here, but your away in body.

I feel you, I feel your breath,
as it softly blows in my ear.
Two years have passed,
and this feeling is still here with me.
You are with me.
I can feel you.

I can feel you now,
lying next to me as we watch the stars together.

Nursery Rhyme wonders

2006-02-16T00:50:00.000Z

Nursery Rhyme wonders

Did you know that there is a nursery rhyme being sung to children that encourage them to eat worms (at least the child is meant to sing it when they feel unloved)? It is called the WORMS song. My legal system lecturer sang in it class yesterday. It is pretty addictive, It is stuck in my head. Take a look at the lyrics.

Worms

Nobody loves me
Everybody hates me
Guess Ill eat some worms.
Big fat juicy ones
Teeny Weeny skinny ones
see them crawl along.
Ill bite off their heads
and suck in the juice
and throw their skins away
Nobody knows this
but I like to eat worms
three times a day.

-end-

The lyrics are of what I remembered only. It might be slightly longer. So what is the point of nursery rhymes likes this? The age old nursery rhyme, rock a bye baby, itself, if you study the literature behind it, is a murder tale.

It is funny how till today we sing all these tales to our children, but what do they really mean? What are we trying to tell them?

Rock Climbing

2006-02-01T16:09:00.000Z

Rock Climbing

Yes! I finally did rock climbing. Always wanted to do it, but never got down to doing it till today.

It was a quiet trip down to Port Dickson for me, although Port Dickson was filled with people as expected for it is the Chinese New Year break. I got there yesterday. Besides the usual things I do like sailing, chilling at the club, walking on the beach, etc, I got a chance to do some rock climbing at Ocean View Resort.

One of my mates, Brenda has a holdiay home there. That is how I got to know about the 36 feet Rock Climbing Wall. Yes. Its 36 feet tall. Quite ambitious for a person like me who has never done rock climbing in her entire life. Unsure about what she is about to face.

Here are some shots of this experience.

Getting geared up. The harnest is so tight. The shoes are weird looking. It was the shape of my feet (its purpose is so you get the best grip possible). Helmet is the kids size one, cause I have a real small head.

All set. Ready to go.
Check out my nervous smile.

Where is my right foot supposed to go now?

Only half way through. Still got 18 feet to go. This is more difficult than it looks. I kinda look like spiderman stuck on a wall.

Almost there. Now to reach for that last rock. Oh no! My legs are shaking. How do I lift myself to ring that bell? This top bit was much trickier than the lower bits because all of the sudden, the rocks shrunk ( no! not literally. As in they were just smaller rocks).

Ahah! The top! I made it! Woo Hoo. Time to ring the bell.

Coming down was the best part. Just hanging on to the rope and kicking the wall as they lower the rope. Brilliant feeling. It was like I was starring in a Peter Pan movie. Now my legs are feeling funny.

WALAH! hehehe. Yes, thats the "im so happy im on land" smile complete with a feline pose. (cats always land on their feet)

Can you believe I got a certiticate for climbing 36 feet high? Awesome aint it?

This was an awesome experience. And its all thanks to Brenda (please dont kill me for posting your picture up).

and now my body aches.

Toodles!

Souled Out

2006-01-11T05:09:00.000Z

Souled Out

It was my first time at Souled Out with Ralph. He took me there for dinner last Tuesday. It is such a cool place, the waiters and waitress all clad really cool souled out t-shirts, with souled out caps and bandanas. Some wear three quarter pants, khaki pants, jeans, just name all the pants in the world. Its a free choice I think. It might just need to look a little bling. With all the variety, they all still look uniformed with the matching caps, bandanas and t shirts. Really attractive place to work at.

I know I was excited, that I could not stop looking around the place. Ralph of course was deeply concentrated in the menu in front of him. He has been here so may times, and He still needs a menu. Hmmmm. I open the menu, and with just one glance, I order. Hahah…different characters I guess.

Dinner was lovely and the company was brilliant. I had so much fun. After dinner, Ralph and I went to the Pool Bar above Fandangos in Hartamas to play some pool.

For the record, I suck at pool

Im just good at posing.

And Ralph, is so good at it! Every ball he hits goes into the pockets! Guess someones been playing a lot of pool back in New Zealand.

Overall, I had a fun night. It was awesome.

I hope to get another chance like this, and I hope that mum and dad will let me out again this time.

Still Up Waiting

2006-01-08T09:10:00.000Z

Still up waiting

The clock is ticking. I still wait up.
I dont know what I am doing up,
Why am I staying up?
What is the reason for me to stay up?
Perhaps its because I love him.

I think I love him
But then again it could be that I am worried,
Or that I just care a lot for him,
Or maybe it is because Im afraid of loosing him
Afraid of living life without him
Afraid of walking a lonely road without him
Afraid that something might happen to him

Something melancholy
Something that will make me spend the rest of my life regretting
Regretting that I could not do something
Regretting that I did not do something
Regretting that I was not with him.

The clock is ticking. And I am still up waiting.
I don’t know why I drive myself crazy
Crazy over the fact that he is not here
Crazy for sacrificing precious sleep
All for one guy.

Maybe it is because
Maybe it is just because
Maybe it is simply because I love him.

I love him.

The clock is ticking. And I am still up.

Christmas at PD

2006-01-02T13:25:00.000Z

Christmas at PD

I spent christmas in Port Dickson with the boys. It was lots of fun.

We went on a sunset cruise.

Thats Prashant, Ralph, Me, and Matthew on the sunset cruise enjoying the tsunami waves.

Just chilling on the boat

"let's play some snooker!"

Ralph seems to be enjoying himself

Nothing but a simple sweet smile from Ralph. Never fails to smile.

Matt chilling before the cruise.

Me posing before the cruise. hehehe... I just love pictures.

Well, that was a few shots of christmas in Port Dickson... will try and post more soon.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Face Hunt 2005

2005-11-23T15:50:00.000Z

Face Hunt 2005

Hey there fellow bloggers,

I need your help!

I took part in a competition in my university, called Face Hunt 2005. Where I had to send in my photograph. From all the photos they received, the organising committee had to pick out 20 people.

I am one of the 20 finalist.

Now, to win I need your help by voting for me via sms.

just type:

face(space)309530

and send to:

32299

each vote is rm0.50.

You can vote as many times as you want.

Please vote for me.

I could use every vote I get.

All the money from your smses will go to charity.

Can check out my current position at:

www.mygamma.com.my/facehunt

So help me out,

please......

VOTE FOR ME!!!!

Thanks!

(p/s: only people with Malaysian numbers can vote)

The man below the jacarana tree

2005-11-04T18:00:00.000Z

The man below the jacarana tree

He was tall and dark. His eyes were the mysterious sort. When they looked at you, they looked with might and fear, seeking help and trust. Yet he stood a mile away, arms crossed, as if he prefered isolation. There he stood below the jacarana tree, isolated from the village people.

I stood on well made parquet wood of this house made of rosewood with ivory grown all around it. I searched around for my darling, but he was to where to be found. There were too many people around me. My heart started to beat faster. I hate being around too many people. Makes me feel like I am drowning in an ocean of human beings.

I run outside... Fall on my knees. Bad migrain has hit me.

Everything spins around me.

I was about to pass out, but a tall shadow stood in front of me. I look up, and see the tall man that stood in front of the jacarana tree. He bent down.

"krriiing, krriiing!"

Damn* that stupid phone had to interupt my weird dream.

I am still having a slight migrain.

Oh I hate waking up on the wrong side of the bed.

Stupid phone, why did you have to ring?

Bad mood.

To whom it may concern

2005-11-03T19:01:00.000Z

To whom it may concern

This may seem like a hindi movie to some, a boring lecture to another and to whom it concerns, its the literal truth.

When a boy and girl from two totally different backgrounds unite, there is bound to be trouble in paradise. Many of us believe, that this should not possibly happen if it is true love. In reality, this will happen whether you come from the same background or not. People never seem supportive of a relationship when all they see is the relationship hurt you.

You cant force someone to support you, before you realise the kind of support you need. It is definately not, "oh well done, you found a great guy!". If you want this sort of support, id suggest see an aquaintance whom is a hopeless romantic.

For a relationship like this to survive, there is only one thing to do and that is hold on to each other through thick or thin. What people say should not matter to you, nor effect you. You want to call it love, then dont misuse the word and understand it first.

You criticise the fact that when things are at the worst for you, that your friends and your close ones are not there for you. Here is the truth(although I know it sounds harsh), if we are not there for you we would not be telling you to get a reality check. True friends tell you the absolute truth without adding any spice to it. Do you prefer someone poise as a friend and tell you what a great couple you guys make?

Almost everyday now, I watch you weep and beg him to stay with you, or that he hurt you. How the hell do you expect anyone to react positively to that. It looks like your going to be in a nut house soon for a severe case of depression. You dont talk to anyone about him, you only talk when you guys hit rock bottom, how exactlly are we supposed to way the good side of things? guess? If you really need my support, you wuld think about the position you are in now. Does this relationship make you hurt more than it makes you happy? If it makes you happy, then why do I still see you weep everyday? Is it because you think you are happy? Is it because your friends do not support you?

My dear, are you the same girl I know who calls herself a good christian? the one that insist we head to church every sunday, and spend enough time with God? Yet why is it that right now, you fail to turn to God ? Instead take the easy way out and mock your friends when they ask you to think about your future. You say it hurts that we dont seem to support you, my dear, if you cant think of there being a future, there isnt much hope for you really(sorry to say).

"Begin with the end in mind- 2nd habit"
- from Sean Coveys 7 habits of highly effective people

You do not need anybodys support neither do you have to prove it to anyone if you really love this guy from your own free will. The only support you should seek is God's. Place our relationship into God's hands and he will take care of it. God loves you and has a plan for you.

"God is love"
- 1 John 4:16

Its been almost two years now for this couple I know extremely well, and it may seem like it is going well. Yes, it is going well, not because they come from similar backgrounds but because they trust and hold on to each other. Life has not been a bed of roses for them. People only want to see them fail in life, his friends think she is a fraud, his parents use to doubt their existance, and her parents had no clue about the relationship. Yet, time eased everything. Just hold on to each other and time will make things better. It has for them, and they thank God everyday for that, because He was the only person who was there for them when the ground shook, and he held them firm in his loving arms, he never let go.

It hurt me to know, that when I tell you the truth, you see it as I dont support you. Fact is if I did not support you, I would not bother wasting my time trying to get you a reality check. You think all your weeping has not worried me? If I dont say anything, its because im afraid ill say the wrong thing.

Think about it! I have not seen you laugh or smile sincerely in more than a month now. You think it does not hurt me to see you like this? It not only hurts me, but the people around you too who have hardly a clue on whats going on.

True love is a sacrifice, but it is not a sacrifice of ones happiness. My dear, are you really happy? If you really are, then im happy for you too. I cant promise to give you the ultimate support you dream off but I can surely try.

First talk to me, only then judge what I have to say.

Truth remains, you do not need anyone to support you. You just need him to trust you and hold on to you strong. Lift this relationship into God's hands, and let him help you. God will give you peace.

As for you, (fella thats in this with her). Ever watched the movie "guess who?" A white guy wants to marry a black girl. People say lots of things about them, but they only trusted each other and held on to each other. A strong advice given from the girls father to the boy is, if your really love her and want her, then she is right! She is right! Face the music, and dance to its beat.

p/s: I aint no psychologist, nor am I a marriage counsler. I only speak from my point of view. If you beg to differ, feel free to comment and share it with us.

So stop whining, and start thinking of what I have to say.

Watching God

2005-10-31T19:40:00.000Z

Watching God

Its pouring outside. I peer outside the window, and see God showering the earth. Its so wonderful to sit and watch God work. He creates an atmosphere that is serene, an arousing mood to dance...

The rain pouring down, the slight chill from the cold, the living room of an apartment all lit with candles making the mood romantic.

Put on a little latin music, and feel it. Feel it. Then put on your dancing shoes, and get yur partner to sway with you. Sway, and twirl, and salsa! Feel him. Feel him on the dance floor. Salsa has got to be the worlds sexiest dance, cause you have to feel the passion to dance it well.

In a mood so perfect like this, all I want to do, is dance. Dance all through the day, and just forget everything else, but my partner who feels the music I am feeling at the moment.

God really knows how to make a girl happy. He just made music, and everything falls in place when we feel it.

Some of my favourite latin, salsa tracks to dance to are:

Paulina Rubio
- Baila Casanova

Santana feat. Mana
- Corazon Espinado

Enrique Iglesias
- Bailamos

Santana
- Maria Maria

Marc Anthony
- Dimelo

Shakira
- Objection

Oh the rain is subsiding, the mood is fading.... I'll just go back and peer outside the window and watch God.

Purple Sneakers

2005-10-31T09:06:00.000Z

Purple Sneakers

The dearly loved pair of purple sneakers with purple sequences on them from NOSE is gone.

They are all sold out.

Why would anybody else want those purple sneakers but me?

I have wanted that pair for months now. Oh why, oh why did I wait so long to get them. Now its gone. I love that pair. I want that pair. Now its no more.

All my fault.

Snif

Agony hits my day...

Rotten Kiwi

2005-10-26T04:28:00.000+01:00

Rotten Kiwi

I ate a rotten Kiwi fruit today! I have never come across a rotten kiwi fruit before. Have you? (and dont give the fact that all fruits rot)

The kiwi fruit looks pretty much the same as the rotten one would look like only when cut, it is of a darker green inside. It looks very elegant. Not fungus green, but a leafy green. Very warm, and lovely. Wonder why it looks prettier when its rotten. Another one of Gods mysterious creations.

Kiwi fruit has a sourish taste with a dash of jelly like sweetness. However when it is rotten, it maintains its jelly like sweetness with a strong bitter-sour taste. What a weird taste to have in the morning. It sure woke me up!

Neways, Im off dinner. Just felt like telling you about my weird kiwi fruit incident which happened this morning, and tog ive you some absolutely useless facts about rotten kiwi fruits.

toodles!

Roses are red

2005-10-02T18:54:00.000+01:00

Roses are red

My favourite flower as most of you would have suspected is indeed the rose. Maybe that is the explanation to why I was named Rose. Haha...nope, I was named Rose after my grandmother. (I still think there is a double explanation to why I was named Rose)

I could just walk into a florist and buy a single rose, or even buy a stock of roses from the market. Roses are just everything to me. It cheers me up as well as ice cream does. A rose a day, keeps Rose on her feet...

I was browsing the web, and I came across a website called rose gathering. It is one of the most informative sites on roses that I have ever come across. Bloggers, if you are interested in knowing where roses came from, what their colours mean, what each scent and petal mean, check out this website under symbolism of roses.

http://www.rosegathering.com/symbols.html

Any of you, have better "about roses" sites, do let me know, it be fun to share it with the rest.

I love, yet I hate...

2005-09-30T18:29:00.000+01:00

I love, yet I hate...

I love theatre
I love the things around me that make me feel who I really am
I hate not being able to express myself

I love company
I hate loneliness
I hate having to figure out whom to have lunch with
I love people
I hate people telling me what to do

I hate window shopping because it makes me feel so sad when I see something I like and cant afford it as my taste is pretty expensive
I hate seeing things that tempt me

I love the smell of freshly cut grass,
The smell of the ocean
I love the scent of my sweetheart
I hate the smell of perfumes that give me migraines

I love being right
I hate knowing that Im wrong

I hate men in control
I love men who are sexually in control

I love to speak
I hate being shut up

I love long bubble baths
I hate being rushed out of a shower

I love watching people do things, and day dream while they are at it

I hate people day dreaming, while watching me do something

I love ice cream
I hate nutty ice creams

I love leading
I hate being the only one with ideas

I love playing the classical guitar
I hate people who show off when they play the guitar

I love to watch dreams come true
I hate hearing people say it cant be done

I love making my breakfast look good
I hate all the other meals of the day

I love writing note down
I hate re-writing them

I love speed
I hate it when people tell me to slow down

I love Pisang Goreng (fried banana)
I hate bananas

I love blogging
I hate running out of things to say

ta!

Kiss me

2005-09-23T19:36:00.000+01:00

Kiss Me

I find the lyrics to this song so romantic. I know its a very old song, but just imagine standing with the person you love most, under moonlight...

KISS ME

Kiss Me out of the bearded barley,
nightly, beside the green grass.
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step,
you wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight,
lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand,
strike up the band and make the fire flies dance,
silver moons sparkling, so kiss me.

Kiss me down by the broken tree house,
swing me upon its hanging tire.
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat,
we'll take the trail marked on your father's map.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight,
lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand,
strike up the band and make the fire flies dance,
silver moons sparkling, so kiss me.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight,
lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand,
strike up the band and make the fire flies dance,
silver moons sparkling, so kiss me.
So kiss meSo kiss me

- Six Pence None The Richer-

Buried Sadness

2005-09-20T04:10:00.000+01:00

Buried Sadness

I see sadness deep in your eyes,
sadness haunting, haunting....

but the smell of the ocean,
the warmth in the wind,
the life in your smile,
makes me miss you so much more...

Yet, the sadness still in your eyes
sadness sitting, sitting...

to kiss you on a sandy beach
to hold you in my arms,
and know that your mine
makes me miss you so much more...

The sadness prolongs its stay,
so cold, so cold...

I wish I knew what I could do
to take that sadness from your eyes
and bury it far, far away...

But, I will sit, and ponder, ponder
waiting for you to return
as the night prolongs its stay....

Doggie Name Contest

2005-09-17T06:20:00.000+01:00

Doggie Name Contest

As a lot of you know, I have a little cousin named Mary Rose, and she just got a puppy and needs our help to give it a name. Contest details are below. Please help her out, put on your thinking caps and get creative, because she is giving away a mysterious prize....

DOGGIE NAME CONTEST
Mary Rose has a puppy! And the puppy needs a name. Join the contest to name the doggie and win a prize….

Doggies Details

Female, three months old.
Beagle-Daschund cross.
Has lovely face, angel eyes.
Friendly personality, extremely playful.
Can hop like a rabbit!

Contest Rules
1. You may submit any number of entries for the contest.
2. Please submit entries with your full name and phone number.
3. Entries must be submitted on paper to No 5 Lorong Bukit Pantai Satu or via SMS to 012-3996969.
4. Closing date is 20th September 2005 at 6pm.
5. Judges decision will be final.
6. Puppy may be viewed at above address.
7. Winner will be announced on 25th September 2005 together with the prize.

PM's Handshake

2005-09-13T01:20:00.000+01:00

Prime Ministers Handshake

I told you guys I met the Prime Minister of Malaysia, Pak Lah. His hand shake is one of the warmest handshakes I've received in a while, and you know what they say about handshakes? If they are warm and firm, it means they want to know you better. Guess I'll be dealing with Pak Lah soon....

Toodles!

The missing feline

2005-08-28T20:56:00.000+01:00

The missing feline

Yes, I know I have been missing in action for quite some time... been so busy with work and travelling. I just got back from India from my cousins wedding. Want to hear about my trip, give me a call, or just message me through my blog, too much to talk about.

I've got lots of juicy gossip like how I met the Prime Minister of Malaysia. Will post the pictures up soon. As for my trip to India, check out the pictures at my Photo spot. The link is right below my picture on the right margin. Click on "More of the purple cat"

Till then.... Cheers!

I will never be a...

2005-08-11T21:30:00.000+01:00

I will never be a...

I will never be a...

1. Brother
2. Brother in law
3. Father
4. Father in law
5. Grandfather
6. Uncle
7. Granduncle
8. Great Grandfather
9. Great Granduncle
10. Son
11. Son in law
12. Cousin brother
13. Husband
14. Nephew
15. Boyfriend
16. Grandson
17. Franciscon Friar
18. Priest
19. Fish Monger
20. Master
21. King
22. Postman
23. Policeman
24. Head master
25. Fireman
26. Prince
27. Queen's Knight
28. Alter Server
29. Conductor
30. Bridegroom
31. Bestman
32. Paige boy
33. Steward
34. Host
35. Waiter
36. Sugar Daddy
37. Choir master
38. Actor
39. Step Father
40. Step Son
41. Half Brother
42. Singer
43. Sperm Donour
44. Rapist
45. Salesman
46. Pope
47. Cardinal
48. Archbishop
49. Monsignor
50. Abbot
51. Duke
52. Widower
53. Earl
54. Viscount
55. Baron
56. Lord
57. Baronet
58. Rabbi
59. Rector
60. Marquess

All because I am a Woman!

To him...

2005-08-05T07:19:00.000+01:00

To him...

"all of life's a play and you, you can contribute one verse!" - Dead Poets Society

I lost someone very dear to me today. He was one of the most amazing person that I have ever met. He believed that if you can feel your heart beat, that means your alive, and that means what ever is dear to you, that you have kept in your heart, is alive too, so believe that you have a purpose in life, and that is to keep that heart beating.

He was a friend I had made when I first stepped into theatre and drama. Someone who believed, that we are all actors born to colour our lives with drama.

I learnt alot from him... He taught me how to love life, and live it. It's so sad to hear that only 24 years of living, and its the end for him. From what he taught me, the most important thing when someone passes away, is not how many years he lived, but whether he lived life? 24 years is short, but he made the most of it, and I just have to respect him for that.

Today, a single white rose was sent to me with a note saying "keep that heart beating and live!" and I did not understand... but now I do, and I am so sorry I did not understand any earlier.

I am going to miss you so much Steven! Thanks for showing me so much.

p/s: We will meet soon on stage in a broadway musical to be performed for Him who loves us all!

True

2005-07-22T07:05:00.000+01:00

True

Look at me
with a naked eye
and understand me

Walk with me
under a sunset sky
and embrace me

Dine with me
on a random day
and know me

Cry with me
with tears of dismay
and feel me

Swim with me
across the sea
and cleanse me

Colour with me
my life in grey
and love me

Stay with me
in my heart always
and hold on to me

Be true to me
and I shall stay
dont lie to me

and I shall be true to you always...

(Thank you Rafiki for showing me so much)

My Fathers Daughter

2005-07-22T06:57:00.000+01:00

My Fathers Daughter

I never understood why man have so much ideals in life, the one that struck me the most is the "worlds greatest father", a man made award through my eyes. A father is a man that has made the vow to take care of you, and knows his responsibilities as a father, and a husband. In my view, a great father is not one who spends time with his family, work for a living, provide for a household, etc., but a man who realises that he is a father and takes great pride in being one. Spending time with family is a good thing, but loving that time spent makes it a great thing.

I never realised how hard it is to love your father while working with him, especially when he is a stubborn, fussy, short-tempered man, who now is your boss. I find it so easy to get carried away with work, that we tend to forget what we do and why we are doing it. We dont work with passion nor understanding of what we really are doing, yet still dream endlessly of a life long fortune. By doing this we stray away from our true indentity, and what we are to others.

A great father is a man, despite all the work and conflicts, knows that he may be a boss, but he is still a father, and she may be an employee, but still his daughter. I may disappoint you daddy, but know that I try. Despite all the reasoning, I am my fathers daughter.

Electronic Newspaper

2005-07-14T01:45:00.000+01:00

Electronic Newspaper

I always thought that fiction will always stay fiction, and imagination was just what we want in life. After watching Harry Potter, where we see people move in a picture, reports updating itself on a piece of paper, I never really thought that this could one day be real. Yes, let me introduce you to the electronic newspaper. I discovered this today when one of my workmates was telling us how in the future we would be so advanced in technology yet still living with traditional styles.

An electronic newspaper is a self-contained, reusable, and refreshable version of a traditional newspaper that acquires and holds information electronically. (The electronic newspaper should not be confused with newspapers that offer an online version at a Web site.) The near-future technology - researchers expect to have the product available as soon as 2003 - will use e-paper (electronic paper) as the major component. Information to be displayed will be downloaded through a wireless Internet connection. A number of versions of the future technology are in development, although there are two frontrunners: Xerox's Palo Alto Research Center (PARC) is working on a newspaper that would consist of a single sheet of their e-paper (called Gyricon), while Lucent, in partnership with a company called E Ink, is working on a multi-page device (also called E Ink).

The Gyricon version consists of a single sheet of transparent plastic, containing millions of tiny bichromal (two color) beads in oil-filled pockets. Text and images are displayed through rotation of the beads that occurs in response to electrical impulses: a full rotation displays as black or white, and a partial rotation displays as gray shades. Nick Sheridon, a senior research fellow at PARC, has been working towards a viable electronic newspaper for over twenty years. Sheridon sees Xerox's device as consisting of a sheet of Gyricon wound around a spring mechanism in a lightweight cylinder. The user would pull the page out of a slit in the cylinder; in the process, the page would pass over a printer-like device which had downloaded data from the Internet through a wireless connection. To access another page, the reader would return the sheet to the cylinder, select the page, and draw the sheet from the scroll. The device could be carried like an umbrella, and would fit in a large purse or a briefcase. Sheridon projects that a Gyricon-based electronic newspaper could be available within three years. Currently, Gyricon uses 50-micron beads for a resolution of 200 dpi (dots per inch); the use of 30-micron beads will increase resolution to 300 dpi, slightly better than that of traditional newspapers.

Lucent's E Ink device uses electronic ink and combines thin, plastic, flexible transistors with polymer LEDs (light-emitting diodes) to create what are called smart pixels. The process involved - which is not dissimilar to traditional printing processes - uses silicon rubber stamps to actually print tiny computer circuits onto the surface. E Ink uses electronic ink for display: millions of tiny capsules filled with light and dark dyes that change color - charged dye particles move either up or down within the capsules - when exposed to an electric charge. According to Paul Drzaic, the director of display technologies, prototypes of the device have been running on watch batteries. Although the technology has been used for retail signs, Lucent says that an E Ink-based electronic newspaper is still at least 10 years away, because electronic ink has not been sufficiently developed to make complex displays practical.

IBM is also working on an electronic ink-based device. IBM's electronic newspaper is in a book-like format, and is constructed of 16 pages of flexible, fiberglass-reinforced paper, each about 8.5" by 11." The lightweight pages are bound by a rigid metallic bar, and covered with a clear, protective cover sheet. Charged dye particles move either up or down within the capsules - causing light or dark areas to appear in the display - when exposed to an electric charge . The whole device could be rolled or folded similarly to a traditional newspaper. Like the E Ink-based electronic newspaper, IBM's version is several years away.

I never thought there would come a point where the Harry Potter movie becomes more realistic. Looks like it is. It's almost like watching CNN, because you can get the breaking news constantly. I will try and upload some pictures of it. It is very cool. Funny part is, the more advanced we get, we tend to be following the traditional footsteps.

(some source from CIO.com)

Irony

2005-07-11T01:40:00.000+01:00

Irony

I find it ironic...

that a celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

that a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.

that one is a vegetarian not because he loves animals, but because he hates plants.

that Sir Winston Churchill prepares his impromtu remarks.

that John Grisham loves being a writer but cant stand the paper work.

that as a child, the library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you’re grown up, your credit card does it.

that the cure for writers cramp is writers block.

that when your cat has fallen asleep on your lap and looks utterly content and adorable, you will suddenly have to go to the bathroom.

that when a restaurant gets too crowded nobody goes there.

that there is a fish that walks on land-mudskipper.

that on a cold day when it is raining people feel depressed but when it gets cold enough to snow they cheer up again.

What do you find ironic in life? Feel free to express them...

contributed with the help of Rafiki

Once upon a time, son

2005-07-09T22:15:00.000+01:00

Once upon a time, son

Once upon a time, son,
they used to laugh with their hearts
and laugh with their eyes:
but now they only laugh with their teeth,
while their ice-block cold eyes
search behind my shadow.

There was a time indeed
they used to shake hands with their hearts:
but that's gone, son
Now they shake hands without hearts
while their left hands search
my empty pockets.

"Feel at home"!"Come again";
they say, and when I come
again and feel
at home, once, twice,
there will be no thrice-
for then I find the doors shut on me.

So I have learned many things, son.
I have learned to wear many faces
like dresses-homeface,
officeface, streetface, hostface,
cocktailface, with all their comforting smiles
like a fixed potrait smile.

And have learned too
to laugh with only my teeth
and shake hands without my heart
I have also learned to say, "good bye",
When I mean "good-riddance";
to say "glad to meet you",
without being glad; and to say "it's been
nice talking to you",after being bored.

But believe me, son.

I want to be what I used to be
When I was like you. I want
to unlearn ll these muting things.
Most of all, I want to relearn
how to laugh, for my laugh in the mirror
shows only my teeth like a snakes bare fangs!

So show me, son,
how to laugh; show me how
I used to laugh and smile
Once upon a time when I was like you.

written by Gabriel Okara, 1921

This poem is one of my favourite poems as it reflects what we are today. In reality most of us wear masks, and that should not be the way to laugh nd smile. Learn to laugh and smile and take of that mask...

Cheers!

Legal Work

2005-07-06T04:42:00.000+01:00

Legal work

I started work yesterday, hoping to take away the holiday boredom. Sadly to say, work is worse than bumming at home. Im working with an IT company, that is teaching me how to handle legal work to prepare me as a law student. Law is a fun subject, and can be a little too much to handle at times. This is not true in reality.

I was given this legal case the company is involved in, and asked to read the details of the defendant's (the company I work for) case. All I did yesterday was read. This was a little too easy. What do you want me to do? I had thought it be a little more difficult. Guess not...

I was told, that today I would be dealing with the lawyer involved. I have to call her and get her advise on some of the matters. Finally some real work... At least I hope so.

This is all I have to say about my first day of work. Got to run now... late for work!

Time spent with dad

2005-07-01T20:54:00.000+01:00

Time spent with dad

It has only been 9 days since exams got over, and I feel extremely bored. In the past 9 days, I have indulged in a few tubs of ice cream all by myself, arranged my books about 75 times , played about 576 tunes on my guitar, slept for more than 12 hours a day, watched 24 episodes of "The OC", made 7 power point presentations for fun, watched all the movies that I missed during exams ( A series of unfortunate events, hitch, the English patient, be cool, etc...), caught the primere of "War of the Worlds" on the first day of release not to mention excellent seats from advanced bookings, played "Cat Woman" at a movie character walkabout, ate waffles with my cousins, browsed through the classifieds, and spent quite a bit of time with my dear dad.

I never realized how much fun time spent with dad could be. When I was doing my A-levels, I pretty much crowded my life style with books, college, hanging with friends, getting my car fixed, etc... I was always out of the house. The only time I did see my dad would be in the morning, when he would be drinking his black coffee in front of the TV watching market shares on CNBC, or during lunch when we would have a quiet lunch, just the two of us. Those little moments was enough for me to call time spent with dad. However in this past 9 days, I spent more time than I usually did with him. He isnt well, and has been instructed to take strict leave for about 3 weeks. He sits mostly in front of the tv either watching a movie, wimbeldon, news, or searching for his missing DVDs.

We went down to Hartamas Shopping Centre and did a bit of shopping. Shopping with dad meant gadget shopping. All electronic goods, plasma screen TVs, Hi-fi systems, notebooks, hand phones, digital video cameras, kitchen goods(where we bought a toaster), etc... As a bonus, we hit times bookstore, where I had dad searching for the newspaper and after he found that the newspapers were sold out, he tried desperately to pull me out of the literature section where I was totally lost in the books. The only way to pull me out of the section was to get me a few books which he did. I have something to read now, Women in Love by D.H. Lawrence. *Sigh*
there is nothing better than burying yourself in a book, except ice cream off course.

We had spent a whole 2 hours in the mall. Yesterday, I drove him to bangsar where we bought dinner, and 11 DVD's to keep dad occupied. The roads were a little jammed, as I squeezed the steering wheel tighter, knowing that this is one one the few times where dad has sat in a car which I was driving. All the anxiety, not wanting to make a mistake. I had to live up to his standards, his expectations, and that meant good driving, skilled. In the end, he never commented, so I take it that either it wasnt bad driving, or he just couldnt be bothered on how I drove. Perhaps something else was playing in his mind.

There is so many things I want to talk to dad about. My view of the world, how things work, my hopes, dreams and maybe even my love life. 3 weeks may seem like a short time, but I'll use every minute I have. Besides, I will be working with dad handling legal matters ( at least learning about it) starting next week for about 3 months. So looks like I do have more time. Ah, skip it, I just love spending time with my dad!

What is love?

2005-06-30T18:50:00.000+01:00

What is love?

Love is blind ~anon

God is love ~ 1 John 4:16

Love is a fruit of all seasons, and within reach of every hand ~Mother Teresa

Love is not what we become, but what we already are ~ Stephen Levine

Love is an extremely difficult realisation that something other than oneself is real ~ Iris Murdoch

The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference ~Elie Wiesel

Love sees through a telescope, not a microscope ~anon

Love is patient, love is kind, love is not envious, or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way, it is not irritable, or resentful, it does not rejoice in wrong doing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, hopes all things, and endures all things ~ 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two ~ Captain Corelli's Mandolin

The purest love of all if when you do not expect the object of your love to love you back. If they do, it’s a bonus, but when you expect it, it cheapens love ~ Arvind Patmarajah

Love is...Inhaling deepYour fresh smell,Holding you closeTo my chest,Knowing alwaysThat you will be there...~ Obukwor E. Bigjoe

Love is a strong word, you only say it to those who are most important and influencial in your life ~Heather Hoskins

Love, like a river, will cut a new path whenever it meets an obstacle ~ Dj Roberts

Love is like a grocery store, you don't know which one to choose ~Ruhi

Love is truly sacrificing oneself for a cause that can blind you cause of how strong it is ~ Rafiki

Love knows no reasons. Love knows no lies. Love defies all reasons. Love has no eyes. Love is not blind; it sees but it doesn't mind. Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. Love is so easy to feel, so hard to explain; easy to get, so hard to let go; easy to spell, so hard to define ~ Miss Ely

Love is sublime wish,Don't aflame it ~ L.G.Vaidyanathan

You can lead a heart to love but you can't make it fall ~ anon

Come on time to fill in the blanks with your view

Love is......

Drinks-mixed

2005-06-14T03:01:00.000+01:00

Drinks-mixed

Water, wine
Vodka lime
We sit and drink at night

Vanilla coke
Gin and juice
Night prolongs its stay

Tequilla shots
and margaritas
talks the night away

Whiskey, shandy
Rum and brandy
holds what is left of the night

Mix the drinks
mix and drink
and we will drink the night away...

Much more today

2005-06-11T21:14:00.000+01:00

Much more today

I love you very much more today,
I wonder why not yesterday
When I felt you in my sleep,
in my dreams, I hope to keep.

I love you very much more today,
I wonder why not last month in may,
When the flowers start to bloom.
Your love would take away the gloom.

Yet I love you very much more today,
I wonder why today I feel this way,
When a day is just another day,
Why not love you much more another day.

I stab like a serial killer

2005-05-30T07:56:00.000+01:00

I stab like a serial killer

I hurt someone.

I hurt a couple of them.

It wasnt supposed to be this way...

I know I am in the grave wrong,

yet I know even if it did not turn out the way it did,
It was his plan...

Sometimes there is too much on my mind,
and I stab...

My stab is like one of a serial killer,
it leaves behind a trademark,
that is so difficult to wash away...

Yet I stabbed him...

I stabbed her...

and now it is as if I have stabbed myself,
in hurt and pain...

Does a serial killer feel the pain of the one he stabs?

My stab lingers in the night,
and rest itself upon the heart,
almost forever...

Wisdom hurts

2005-05-25T05:10:00.000+01:00

Wisdom hurts

Im sitting here sulking. It is so painful. My wisdom tooth is finally showing. I can see a quater of teeth forming at the back of my jaw. It is so painful!!! Does this mean I am wiser? So being wise hurts huh? ouch.... snif* sob*snif* ;(

worst time to go get wiser during my exams, the pain...oh well... this is life!

Im Wiser not older...hehehe...

To water

2005-05-24T05:40:00.000+01:00

To water

O water! Thou art deceiving
from your gentle flow
to the streams of your undying
existance thats fights tomorrow.

I stand, and you cover my body
with your clean, mineralised, firm hands
hands that work its way
from my head downwards-where it lands

at my feet, now cold
with your presence, so alive.
You are clean, but you mold
fresh stains that in me dive

deceiveing me into believing
how pure and chaste you are.
The word goes, "shower, its relaxing"
yet it brings much affair.

I wonder how you always
deceive me into believing
that alls fine, and my ways
are good in absorbing

isolated coldness, bringing sorrow
yet no matter how much you stain me
I will return to you tomorrow
to be decieved again- but thats how it is.

Making my stationary purple

2005-05-17T05:45:00.000+01:00

Making my stationary purple

I bought new stationary today. 3 stabilo medium tip ball pens (which after buying is dismantled and the inside of it is placed into a purple stabilo fine tip ball pen casing), a ruler (which after buying I would colour purple with a permanent marker pen), an eraser (not purple, just plain white), a note pad (purple cover) and a pilot shaker mechanical pencil (also purple).

All this minor adjustment done to my stationary serves to live up my purple social standing. My entire pencil box is purple with a few neutral colours which cannot be avoided. It is rather a waste of time, people say, as only today I realized, that everytime I buy new stationary it would be right before an exam. Yup, my exams start this Thursday, and I am sitting and colouring my ruler purple.

Ironic, I never buy new stationary unless there is an upcoming exam, and I spend so much time making minor adjustments just so it suits me. Just a weird lil thing I like to do. It relieves stress.

Scared with pain

2005-05-15T20:20:00.000+01:00

Scared with pain

I do not want to recall it. The moment, so painful, which scared me for life. How she cried for help, and I stood helplessly, watching the car go up in flames. My heart just broke. She was everything to me, my cotton candy buddy, my shoulder to cry on, my inspiration, my best friend... But now she is gone. Nothing of her remains, nothing except that hollow cry for help, her very last cry. The thought just haunts.

Why should I have to go through this much pain again? Can you not sympathise with me? I do not want to hear your last cry, not now, not while you are still so young, so alive, so you... You mean the world to me, do I not mean something to you, that you can still do that, still chip of a bit of my heart each time you do this.

Please... Do not let me go through this much pain again. That is all I ask from you.

Dateless

2005-05-12T17:45:00.000+01:00

Dateless

What?

You have a date!!!
I thought we are going together, all single?

You know I cant take a date..
It will be wrong, not fair to him.

I have to take someone!!
Why?
I am going single!!!
but i'll be alone...

Do you have to do this to me?

WHAT???

He wants to take me?
really?
Where did you hear this?

Oh my gosh!

(the author is a little confused as to whether she should go single to the a levels ball. Mindless... she has gotta focus on her exams now!)

Between two

2005-05-10T09:24:00.000+01:00

Between two

She likes him and he, he likes her too. Is it fair for anyone to stop them from liking each other? Who are we to say who she is meant to go out with, or allowed to date, or just have heaps of fun with? This bond is between the two of them not the whole world. So why are they those who cry a tear not knowing what to do next, and those hot heads trying to melt away this bond? From her speech, we know she loves him. Yet, she is forced to sacrifice something. True love, or real happiness?

The thought of this just saddens me, as I wish I could do something. I guess, in the end its between the two of them.

The meadow

2005-05-09T16:33:00.000+01:00

The meadow

As I sank into the meadow
I felt the weather change
and suddenly all temperature decreases
in the middle of the avenue
What a wonderful feeling it was
to be loitering around tall foggy grass
feeling the ground where only the pollution of the morning due lay.
I could hear wind roaring strongly
blowing with all might.
I could hear the song of the forest,
tickling my eardrum with delight.
it was like the angel of nature,
just flew by
bringing times of good in life.
I could only see half of the meadow,
as the rest were covered with haze
it was like clouds, the sky,
the blue and white.
Green is the lush meadow...Green soft and cool.
A patch of the desert awaits me in the centre of the meadow
Yet, here the grass is cool and the air is moist.
Small beads of sweat for on my brow
I walk slowly, searching for something...
The cool breeze relieves my desperate search...
Reminding me of the past.
Reminding me of the nights of passion.
Reminding me of the evenings of laughter.

(I wrote this poem with an old friend, Rudhra in 2001, and a dream brought it back)

Dr Love

2005-05-08T04:34:00.000+01:00

Dr Love

This past week has just been filled with loads of conflicts in love and relationships. Today I play the role of Dr Love. Dr Love who is running short on remedies. Never had to deal with these many problems before. Let me share some situations with you.

Problem 1: Ahmad really likes Rachel, and having some hints from close friends that she liked him, made the effort to confess this to her. Having done so, she turns him down saying she liked someone else. Ahmed now feels confused and hurt, and afraid of what would happen if this mysterious other person happened to be his friend. He may have to exile himself from the group to 'save face'.

Problem 2: Jasmine has been dreaming of her dream guy Pradeep, waiting patiently that some day he would ask her out, often day-dreaming of him. One day she hears rumours from various people about Pradeep, advising her to keep away from him. Now Pradeep goes and asks her out to the upcoming ball. In a daze she says yes, but is not sure after hearing all these rumours. This is her dream guy, could he be so bad after all?

Problem 3: Sameer falls madly in love with Jasminder, who comes from a pure punjabi family who values traditions like a goddess. Sameer says he has never felt so much in love before. After only a few days of sneaking behind her parents back, going out, her mum comes to know about it, and threatens to tell her friend Carry's mum about Carry's relationship with her boyfriend Paul who is also kept in secret if Jasminder refuses to break up with Sameer. Jasminder and Carry are best friends.

Problem 4: Steve and Kelly have been going out for 5 years. One day Kelly walks in on Steve kissing Dave, his soccer buddy. Kelly is wondering if that meant her relationship is over, or could Steve just be foolin around?

Problems, problems....so many for a week. There are 7 other problems might I conclude. Although these are the striking ones. Never have I played Dr Love before, and this is starting to be alot of fun although the doctor is running short on remedies. Feel free to assist Dr Love on any of this problems. She needs your help! So start studying on medical love...

(names have been altered to prevent conflicts and protect each individuals reputation)

Angels hang out again!

2005-04-30T01:08:00.000+01:00

Angels hang out again!

I went out with Jess and Ham today. Been a long time since the three of us hung out. You would expect us, being known as the "Charlies Angels" to hang out together all the time, but I guess we are all busy in our own work, whether it is study, work, or even family. We went for lunch and then a movie, "the pacifier". After which we went to do a little shopping for a wallet. Now I am not a fan of shopping, a boys best friend when it comes to shopping. I only shop when I need something.

Our close friend, Matt, who joined us on this hang out and was caught to be extremely bored of us girls going in and out of shops looking for a wallet and most of the time coming out empty handed. Lucky for him and I, we had Ham who knew mid valley at the tip of her fingers. Just name the shop, and she would be able to give you the exact location of it as well as what it sells. That cuts down the number of shops we have to check out. We spent a good 3 hours together, and after having no luck at getting a nice reasonably priced wallet we decided to leave.

It was a nice, short hang out, with a great movie (you have to watch it!) and I enjoyed it. It was an Angel's hang out and as for Matt, he could play the charming, sexy Bosley for today . That tops up an episode of the Charlies Angels get together.

laters...

Birthday Showers

2005-04-29T07:09:00.000+01:00

Birthday showers

Its my birthday today, and to mark this day I would receive showers, which i prefer to call showers of blessings. Yes, thats right! Every year on the 28th of April in Malaysia, it will rain. It's ironic, how I know this fact, and still had lots of pool parties in the past years which most, get ruined by the birthday rain. Maybe I was born on a rainy day and rain was something I should love? Unfortunately, I dont fancy rain at all. All it does is ruin my perfectly straight mouisturised hair. Rain is good on hot days, but it still ruins my hair.

Its funny how hair texture and condition can change with a little rain water. Rain water is not water you should wash your hair with. It does not contain enough minerals as the water we get in the bathroom. Today, the rain that pours down is also filled with acid. Hence, your hair is easily damaged by it. So for those of you who love playing in the rain, know what your getting your hair in for.

Enough of disaster pool parties, next year onwards I will be having rain coat parties. Bring a rain coat, and lets have some fun in the rain without getting our hair wet. Dont believe this fact? Check it out, there are loads of statistics on the net regrading weather reports on months and days in the past years. You would note that every year in Malaysia on April 28th it rains!

"Rain down on me!"

Fashionably late

2005-04-25T19:44:00.000+01:00

Fashionably late

I woke up early this morning. I spent a whole half an hour in the shower stoned, still half asleep. I forced myself to get ready, wondering why I had to go for class so early. I found something to eat- bulls-eye with some toast. A small meal to start the day. Realizing the time, I headed straight for college, rushing so I could get a nice carpark right under the old tall trees that provided my car with shade.

Upon arriving, I found a lovely parking space under the old tall trees which I had hoped for. Parked. Walked to the shuttle bus stop, shuttles my college offers for students to shuttle to other blocks easily. Thank God for the shuttle buses, or else we would have to either walk like a couple of kilometers or park at the respective blocks and be charged a bomb on parking fees. Its by the hour there. At the main block we use student coupons which makes things convenient for us students. I got onto the shuttle. Not too crowded today, maybe it was because I was early. I actually managed to get a seat in the shuttle. Enjoying the breeze of the polluted air of Kuala Lumpur, started to wake me up a little better. I was now more alert of what I was going to do next. Go for class.

I got to my block. Only to realize that law class had been cancelled. Frustrated, I walk up to the library to do some reading as my next class was only at 10am. It was now only 8am. I read for about an hour. Then I get a rather frustrating SMS telling me that English literature class was cancelled too. What a day to come to college? I am not usually the early sort, never punctual. Today I made the effort to be punctual, punctual for nothing but a waste of time. I had to head back now. It was frustrating after making such an effort, the effort was useless. Maybe I am meant to be fashionably late? That's the new trend....

It’s your birthday dad!

2005-04-23T15:02:00.000+01:00

Its your birthday dad!

Its early, and the sun is about to rise
from the hills that spread news like a flashing light
flashing, flashing, so the world will know
know that my dad has turned 56 today!

Over the hill many say, "Old man already!"
Age will always be age. No doubt on that.
He may be a year older, but he is still the same,
The same ol dad I always had,
The same ol dad who always looked young,
to me of course, he is young at heart,
and thats for sure, never failed to entertain,
always on the run, catching up with the latest movies,
just like we teenagers do.

Age is one thing, but the person is another.
My dad will always be young at heart,
My dad will always be my hero,
as he has caught me in his arms on the day I was born,
He is, and will always be my Dad
My one and only Dad, no man can put a stop to that.

So daddy dearest this poem I wrote,
Is a tribute to you on this beautiful day.
May God Continue to bless you always.
I love you daddy!
Happy Birthday!

Lime bubble baths

2005-04-21T20:30:00.000+01:00

Lime bubble baths

It is such a hot and sticky day. Standing in the kitchen, the east, just feels like I will melt in no time. I could do with a nice cold lime bubble bath with ice cubes in it. Oh, what a sensational feeling! I know it seems funny that i mention cold and bubble bath in the same sentence, when bubble baths are usually nice and warm, not for a hot day like this though. Let me tell you a little about lime bubble baths.

Lime bubble baths originated from Chennai, India in the late 80's. Mr Kochi Nair, the founder of lime bubble baths did some research on the effects of fruits on our skin and found that lime was one of the most outstanding fruits for its strong acidic qualities. This fruit has a pH level of 6.0-7.0. This level is an adequate level for good skin. Mr Nair enjoyed soaking in bubble baths as the heat in Chennai can be really hot up to sometimes 42+ degrees. After studying this fruit, noticing its qualities of purity, and its cooling effect, he decided to try adding lime as an essence for his bubble bath. "Never was there a more cooling day in my life!" he concluded after taking the bubble bath with freshly squezzed limes.

Lime is commonly used for skin cleansing in India. More popularly used for facials. It is cleansing, cooling, and natural. Today lime salts have been invented for practical use in a bubble bath. It produces the same effect of freshly squezzed limes, only here we just pop in a few salts instead of squezzing a hundred limes. It is truly one hell of a cooling experience.

Try it yourself! Next time you can't take a hot day, just pop a lime salt into your tub and soak!
(Without the ice cubes off course, unless you want to experience a cool numb effect when you get out, then by all means please do.)

Buy me now...

2005-04-18T22:20:00.000+01:00

Buy me now...

I miss you.
I haven't seen you in days
Yet how often do I see you,
to cherish those tiny moments.
You work to feed me
often till the wee hours of the night,
that I hardly see you, saddens me,

Yet I still miss you
and wait for you to buy me now
buy me now with love,
not with money.
all I ask is for some time

My birthday is in two weeks,
but I wonder if you'll remember
wihout being reminded.
The best gift a child could receive
is the gift of your loving time.
Spend some time with me,
thats all I ask.
So buy me now with love
buy me now with your time
buy me now before it gets too late,
when time can buy no more.

A Gamelan Experience

2005-04-02T22:38:00.000+01:00

A Gamelan Experience

The distinctive sounds from the gamelan drums got my utmost attention. It was something I had heard before. A sound only produced by the gamelan drums. Last night I went and watched Monkey Business, a show on gamelan music at the Actors Studio, Bangsar. It was a brilliant show, with acts all put together with the gamelan. Loads of issues can be raised in gamelan, such as homosexuality, isolation and freedom. Some of the scenes in Monkey Business were quite disturbing yet some superb.

A gamelan is an ensemble normally composed primarily of percussions. It is comprised of an orchestra of tuned gongs, bronze kettles, bronze metallophones, bamboo xylophones, drums, cymbals and flutes that fill the night air with animated music. Melodic parts interlock, divided in such a way that musicians play alternate notes to form the melody line. These interlocking parts, known as kotèkan, require cooperation and a keen sense of rhythm to perform. The two parts of a kotèkan, which are thought of as male and female, are known as "nyangsih" and "polos". The main accents of the nyangsih part are usually on the offbeat, while the main accents of the polos part are usually on the beat.

Gamelan is truly an experience. You must hear it, to know it. It has such a distinctive sound, that you would not mistake it for any other instrument. No other drum produces such a sound. It is music that moves the soul easily and alters the mood. I certainly enjoyed Monkey Business and hope to go for another Gamelan performance just like this. Monkey Business, directed by Krishen Jit was not just the traditional sounds of Gamelan but a few new experiments with the chinese drums and different styles of playing the Gamelan. Double trouble, double the fun!

Have you ever heard Gamelan? Start surfing the net for audio clips. Maybe you would be able to enjoy the tunes too... Go all out for a gamelan experience!

Shore

2005-04-01T05:00:00.000+01:00

Shore

The waves are noisy fingers,
busy sketching their thoughts,
tickling the sand.

bubbling with delight that
it is revealed secret shells,
curiously coloured...

Taurus

2005-03-30T22:07:00.000+01:00

Taurus

Yesterday, Romeo said that people whose star sign is a taurus are the most commanding powerful and forceful people. What could he have meant by that? How do I interpret this sentence? Can I take it literally?

I am a Taurus. Does this mean I am commanding, powerful and forceful? These are good characteristics, but they can also be bad ones. I am confused. Would you please explain what it is you do not like and I will try and change for you...

I want to tell you, but I dont know how. I want to whisper it in your ears, but you are so far away. I want to be assured that I am all you want, all you'll ever need, but you still dont know. It is not that easy after all, sometimes you get what you get at the worst of times. Sometimes maybe even deserved well, but that is how life is...

The wind blows a simple tune and that puts me in a serene position, to wonder and hope of life and love... So calm, so silent, so inspiring...

An Improvement

2005-03-28T23:58:00.000+01:00

An Improvement

When I was assigned to do a topic I just did not like, I was devastated. The topic, law and morality, a topic with no right or wrong answers just arguments that will get you an A. I was not hoping for anything near an A. I hated topics which were so grey, and this was a grey topic.
The question: Evaluate the view that there are areas of private morality that is not the law's business.

Thats my essay...

I read a book sometime last year entitled "What's so great about America?" by Dinesh D'Souza. I dont usually enjoy reading political books but I read this book from loads of recommendations from friends. Not quite interesting, but struck a thought when writing this essay. Finally, one of these boring political books would come into use. My essay had a couple of quotes from this book. It helped with 50% percent of my work.

Now standing in front of the class under the chilly air-cond making me shiver reading my essay out loud for the class. I finish, then get these comments from the class, that made me puzzle in confusion. I just knew it! This was just not my topic, not my day. Yes it is so, I am easily saddened by critism. My teacher then made her comments, another few that made me draw the line of being confused. I so knew this day was not meant to be. I had all these sad, cold thoughts in my mind. I just felt like crying. I wanted to run...,"A very good essay I would say!" She concluded.

What just happened? Did I miss something? For a moment there I thought I was being debated down to having written such a poor essay, but I was wrong! She liked it! yahoo!!

I know it aint an A, but it is certainly an improvement. From being lost in this topic, to loving it.
I am getting there. There is certainly a God above, who loves me!!!

Dream Moods

2005-03-27T03:40:00.000+01:00

Dream Moods

Swifts of wind blow into my ear. The cold weather brings out a gloomy mood. A mood that swings my heart to wonder of life, hope, beauty and love. The melancholy mood helps to remind me of my past, and makes me long for a sip of strawberry hot tea, and curl up in my purple bed spread and dream, dream till I can dream no more...

Welcome to Pizza Hut!

2005-03-23T19:25:00.000Z

Welcome to Pizza Hut!

Dial 1300-88-2525 at 10.30 am

Welcome to Pizza Hut!
Untuk Bahasa Melayu sila tekan 1
For English press 2
(press 2)

Please be reminded that this call is a charged as a local call.
To make an order press 1
To check on delivery status press 2
(press 1)

Here is our menu, have a pick!
For Masala Chicken press 1
For Veggie Lovers press 2
For Seafood Special press 3
For Hawaiian Chicken press 4
For.... press 5
For.... press 6
.....
.....
For more pizzas press 8
For a side order press 9
*the list never ends
(press 4)

You have chosen Hawaiian Chicken
For Personal pan press 1
For Regular pan press 2
For Large pan press 3
(press2)

You have chosen Regular pan Hawaiian Chicken pizza.
For stuffed crust press 1
For regular crust press 2
(press 1)

You have chosen Stuffed crust regular pan Hawaiian Chicken pizza
For cheese crust press 1
For sausage and carrot crust press 2
For golden cheese crust press 3
For.... press 4
For.... press 5
*the list never ends
(press 1)

You have chosen Stuffed cheese crust regular pan Hawaiian Chicken pizza
Would you like to make another order with that?
Yes press 1 (its a whole new long list)
No press 2
(press 2)

Finally a telephonist speaks,
Your name: .....
Phone number:.....

Ok, So your ..... from .....(address)
You have ordered a Stuffed cheese crust regular pan Hawaiian Chicken pizza

Your total is RM 25.30. Please provide exact change.
Your pizza will arrive in 30 minutes.
It is now 10.35am, your pizza will arrive at 11.30am.

Thank You for calling Pizza Hut!

(hangs up)

We are so caught up with the flight of new technology today that we tend to be technical in our work. Just to order a simple pizza I took a whole 5 minutes. Imagine those who are not familiar to the names of Pizza's at Pizza Hut, they would have to recall the names and the numbers. We have trouble memorizing history, now why would we want to take this long list of pizzas and numbers up. At no point of this call can you return to the beginning. The only way to change your order without having to wait to the very end of the call is to hang up and start dialing again.

What happen to the old traditional, yet quicker way to order a pizza through a telephonist? If we are going to be so technical, then why do we still have a telephonist at the end of the call asking for your name and number? I think we pay too much tax, for so little labour work. Not to mention the long phone bill.

It's about time we start to acknowledge the fact that technology should only be applied to benefit another instead of slowing the work process. I agree that this automatic phone ordering system is a new technology, but it should only be applied to company's with much less things to say. After all the idea is to quicken the ordering process, not show how fluent Pizza Hut is at a language.

Plus notice, I ordered a pizza at 10.35am and it is said to only arrive at 11.30am. The line before states that my pizza will arrive in 30 minutes. Is it just me, or can Pizza Hut count? Well turns out Pizza hut only opens at 11am. So why keep their phone line on at 10.35am? Can't they just say:

"Welcome to Pizza Hut!"
"Im sorry but our phone lines are only open at 11am"
(hang up)

The problem arises simply because we try to be so technical with the way things work, that we don't stop to realise how it benefits our customers. What are your views on this system?

This is one heck of a ordering process. So it better taste good!

A Million Dollar Closet

2005-03-23T03:10:00.000Z

A Million Dollar Closet

I sat and watched Oprah Winfrey today. The day's title:Oprah auctions her closet. Yes, that's right; people were biding for her beautiful designer gowns and accessories. All collections went to charity. Some of her gowns were sold at top prices like $8500 for a stunning red silk gown, which she wore at party at the White House. She also had a garage sale of more than 1 million dollar worth straight from her closet. All these clothes were of great designers only for such cheap prices. Like this Ralph Lauren Suit at only $70! That is fantastic! Walk into Ralph Lauren, and the cheapest suit are at $1000, walk into Oprah's closet and purchase one at only $70. Biddings are still going on at Ebay starting tomorrow morning for 10 days.

All you Oprah Winfrey fans and Designer wear people, this is a place you should be at. Don't miss it! Log on to Ebay tomorrow morning and get your designer wears. All proceeds go to charity.

Oh how I wish, that one day I could do something so big for charity like auctioning off my wardrobe. Unfortunately bloggers, I can't as my closet aint a million dollar one but hey, I am only 18! Give me a few years, and you'll see a blog inviting you for my auction.

Cheers!