Jitters

11 days more in Malaysia.
Im leaving on a jet plane,
and I dont know when I'll be back again.

I'm starting to feel like I'm leaving behind a huge part of me.
It's a lonesome feeling....
I feel suffocated. I can't Breathe.
My life flashes back at me from time to time.

I don't know what's happening to me.
This is me.
The girl who was, and still is so excited about leaving for the UK.
I'm Nervous.

My bags are already fully packed,
yet I feel like I still have so much more to pack...

Why, oh why am I feeling like this???

Jitters....

Baby,
kiss me and smile for me,
tell me tht you'll wait for me,
hold me like you'll never let me know....

Its so painful, the process of leaving.

Jitters...

The concept of equality is rigid

I've always worked hard for the things I really want.

And I get them...
At least I am satisfied with the results of determination.

I am determined.
Always have been...
I've felt the stress of determination,
the pressure of a willing mind,
and bore a positive attitude.

I've achieved to this end quite a bit.
because like I said,
I've always worked hard for the things I really want.

But now I wonder, If it is all worth it?
If it was ever fair at all?

So many people,
different limitations,
different amount of hard work,
yet all achieve the same outcome...

Why are we made this way?
Some to understand in just a day,
and someone to never understand at all.

Why do people fight for equality,
when no one is equal?

Is equality measured generally?
and if so, then why bother to measure,
yet alone to speak of it?

Life on its own is unequal to everyone.
The only thing that we all have in common,
is the fact that we all dont know when our life will end,
we can only hope, pray, and wonder.
But we will never know for sure....

I am 21 years old,
and I am still determined to do what I want to do.

But I still stop and wonder every now and then,
why I am so determined when the outcome is similar for everyone...

The concept of equality remains rigid.