Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Face Hunt 2005

Face Hunt 2005

Hey there fellow bloggers,

I need your help!

I took part in a competition in my university, called Face Hunt 2005. Where I had to send in my photograph. From all the photos they received, the organising committee had to pick out 20 people.

I am one of the 20 finalist.

Now, to win I need your help by voting for me via sms.

just type:


and send to:


each vote is rm0.50.

You can vote as many times as you want.

Please vote for me.

I could use every vote I get.

All the money from your smses will go to charity.

Can check out my current position at:

So help me out,




(p/s: only people with Malaysian numbers can vote)

Friday, November 04, 2005

The man below the jacarana tree

The man below the jacarana tree

He was tall and dark. His eyes were the mysterious sort. When they looked at you, they looked with might and fear, seeking help and trust. Yet he stood a mile away, arms crossed, as if he prefered isolation. There he stood below the jacarana tree, isolated from the village people.

I stood on well made parquet wood of this house made of rosewood with ivory grown all around it. I searched around for my darling, but he was to where to be found. There were too many people around me. My heart started to beat faster. I hate being around too many people. Makes me feel like I am drowning in an ocean of human beings.

I run outside... Fall on my knees. Bad migrain has hit me.

Everything spins around me.

I was about to pass out, but a tall shadow stood in front of me. I look up, and see the tall man that stood in front of the jacarana tree. He bent down.

"krriiing, krriiing!"

Damn* that stupid phone had to interupt my weird dream.

I am still having a slight migrain.

Oh I hate waking up on the wrong side of the bed.

Stupid phone, why did you have to ring?

Bad mood.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

To whom it may concern

To whom it may concern

This may seem like a hindi movie to some, a boring lecture to another and to whom it concerns, its the literal truth.

When a boy and girl from two totally different backgrounds unite, there is bound to be trouble in paradise. Many of us believe, that this should not possibly happen if it is true love. In reality, this will happen whether you come from the same background or not. People never seem supportive of a relationship when all they see is the relationship hurt you.

You cant force someone to support you, before you realise the kind of support you need. It is definately not, "oh well done, you found a great guy!". If you want this sort of support, id suggest see an aquaintance whom is a hopeless romantic.

For a relationship like this to survive, there is only one thing to do and that is hold on to each other through thick or thin. What people say should not matter to you, nor effect you. You want to call it love, then dont misuse the word and understand it first.

You criticise the fact that when things are at the worst for you, that your friends and your close ones are not there for you. Here is the truth(although I know it sounds harsh), if we are not there for you we would not be telling you to get a reality check. True friends tell you the absolute truth without adding any spice to it. Do you prefer someone poise as a friend and tell you what a great couple you guys make?

Almost everyday now, I watch you weep and beg him to stay with you, or that he hurt you. How the hell do you expect anyone to react positively to that. It looks like your going to be in a nut house soon for a severe case of depression. You dont talk to anyone about him, you only talk when you guys hit rock bottom, how exactlly are we supposed to way the good side of things? guess? If you really need my support, you wuld think about the position you are in now. Does this relationship make you hurt more than it makes you happy? If it makes you happy, then why do I still see you weep everyday? Is it because you think you are happy? Is it because your friends do not support you?

My dear, are you the same girl I know who calls herself a good christian? the one that insist we head to church every sunday, and spend enough time with God? Yet why is it that right now, you fail to turn to God ? Instead take the easy way out and mock your friends when they ask you to think about your future. You say it hurts that we dont seem to support you, my dear, if you cant think of there being a future, there isnt much hope for you really(sorry to say).

"Begin with the end in mind- 2nd habit"
- from Sean Coveys 7 habits of highly effective people

You do not need anybodys support neither do you have to prove it to anyone if you really love this guy from your own free will. The only support you should seek is God's. Place our relationship into God's hands and he will take care of it. God loves you and has a plan for you.

"God is love"
- 1 John 4:16

Its been almost two years now for this couple I know extremely well, and it may seem like it is going well. Yes, it is going well, not because they come from similar backgrounds but because they trust and hold on to each other. Life has not been a bed of roses for them. People only want to see them fail in life, his friends think she is a fraud, his parents use to doubt their existance, and her parents had no clue about the relationship. Yet, time eased everything. Just hold on to each other and time will make things better. It has for them, and they thank God everyday for that, because He was the only person who was there for them when the ground shook, and he held them firm in his loving arms, he never let go.

It hurt me to know, that when I tell you the truth, you see it as I dont support you. Fact is if I did not support you, I would not bother wasting my time trying to get you a reality check. You think all your weeping has not worried me? If I dont say anything, its because im afraid ill say the wrong thing.

Think about it! I have not seen you laugh or smile sincerely in more than a month now. You think it does not hurt me to see you like this? It not only hurts me, but the people around you too who have hardly a clue on whats going on.

True love is a sacrifice, but it is not a sacrifice of ones happiness. My dear, are you really happy? If you really are, then im happy for you too. I cant promise to give you the ultimate support you dream off but I can surely try.

First talk to me, only then judge what I have to say.

Truth remains, you do not need anyone to support you. You just need him to trust you and hold on to you strong. Lift this relationship into God's hands, and let him help you. God will give you peace.

As for you, (fella thats in this with her). Ever watched the movie "guess who?" A white guy wants to marry a black girl. People say lots of things about them, but they only trusted each other and held on to each other. A strong advice given from the girls father to the boy is, if your really love her and want her, then she is right! She is right! Face the music, and dance to its beat.

p/s: I aint no psychologist, nor am I a marriage counsler. I only speak from my point of view. If you beg to differ, feel free to comment and share it with us.

So stop whining, and start thinking of what I have to say.

Monday, October 31, 2005

Watching God

Watching God

Its pouring outside. I peer outside the window, and see God showering the earth. Its so wonderful to sit and watch God work. He creates an atmosphere that is serene, an arousing mood to dance...

The rain pouring down, the slight chill from the cold, the living room of an apartment all lit with candles making the mood romantic.

Put on a little latin music, and feel it. Feel it. Then put on your dancing shoes, and get yur partner to sway with you. Sway, and twirl, and salsa! Feel him. Feel him on the dance floor. Salsa has got to be the worlds sexiest dance, cause you have to feel the passion to dance it well.

In a mood so perfect like this, all I want to do, is dance. Dance all through the day, and just forget everything else, but my partner who feels the music I am feeling at the moment.

God really knows how to make a girl happy. He just made music, and everything falls in place when we feel it.

Some of my favourite latin, salsa tracks to dance to are:

Paulina Rubio
- Baila Casanova

Santana feat. Mana
- Corazon Espinado

Enrique Iglesias
- Bailamos

- Maria Maria

Marc Anthony
- Dimelo

- Objection

Oh the rain is subsiding, the mood is fading.... I'll just go back and peer outside the window and watch God.

Purple Sneakers

Purple Sneakers

The dearly loved pair of purple sneakers with purple sequences on them from NOSE is gone.

They are all sold out.

Why would anybody else want those purple sneakers but me?

I have wanted that pair for months now. Oh why, oh why did I wait so long to get them. Now its gone. I love that pair. I want that pair. Now its no more.

All my fault.


Agony hits my day...

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Rotten Kiwi

Rotten Kiwi

I ate a rotten Kiwi fruit today! I have never come across a rotten kiwi fruit before. Have you? (and dont give the fact that all fruits rot)

The kiwi fruit looks pretty much the same as the rotten one would look like only when cut, it is of a darker green inside. It looks very elegant. Not fungus green, but a leafy green. Very warm, and lovely. Wonder why it looks prettier when its rotten. Another one of Gods mysterious creations.

Kiwi fruit has a sourish taste with a dash of jelly like sweetness. However when it is rotten, it maintains its jelly like sweetness with a strong bitter-sour taste. What a weird taste to have in the morning. It sure woke me up!

Neways, Im off dinner. Just felt like telling you about my weird kiwi fruit incident which happened this morning, and tog ive you some absolutely useless facts about rotten kiwi fruits.


Sunday, October 02, 2005

Roses are red

Roses are red

Image hosted by

My favourite flower as most of you would have suspected is indeed the rose. Maybe that is the explanation to why I was named Rose. Haha...nope, I was named Rose after my grandmother. (I still think there is a double explanation to why I was named Rose)

I could just walk into a florist and buy a single rose, or even buy a stock of roses from the market. Roses are just everything to me. It cheers me up as well as ice cream does. A rose a day, keeps Rose on her feet...

I was browsing the web, and I came across a website called rose gathering. It is one of the most informative sites on roses that I have ever come across. Bloggers, if you are interested in knowing where roses came from, what their colours mean, what each scent and petal mean, check out this website under symbolism of roses.

Any of you, have better "about roses" sites, do let me know, it be fun to share it with the rest.

Friday, September 30, 2005

I love, yet I hate...

I love, yet I hate...

I love theatre
I love the things around me that make me feel who I really am
I hate not being able to express myself

I love company
I hate loneliness
I hate having to figure out whom to have lunch with
I love people
I hate people telling me what to do

I hate window shopping because it makes me feel so sad when I see something I like and cant afford it as my taste is pretty expensive
I hate seeing things that tempt me

I love the smell of freshly cut grass,
The smell of the ocean
I love the scent of my sweetheart
I hate the smell of perfumes that give me migraines

I love being right
I hate knowing that Im wrong

I hate men in control
I love men who are sexually in control

I love to speak

I hate being shut up

I love long bubble baths
I hate being rushed out of a shower

I love watching people do things, and day dream while they are at it

I hate people day dreaming, while watching me do something
I love ice cream
I hate nutty ice creams
I love leading
I hate being the only one with ideas

I love playing the classical guitar
I hate people who show off when they play the guitar

I love to watch dreams come true
I hate hearing people say it cant be done

I love making my breakfast look good
I hate all the other meals of the day

I love writing note down
I hate re-writing them

I love speed
I hate it when people tell me to slow down

I love Pisang Goreng (fried banana)
I hate bananas

I love blogging
I hate running out of things to say

Friday, September 23, 2005

Kiss me

Kiss Me

I find the lyrics to this song so romantic. I know its a very old song, but just imagine standing with the person you love most, under moonlight...


Kiss Me out of the bearded barley,
nightly, beside the green grass.
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step,
you wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight,
lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand,
strike up the band and make the fire flies dance,
silver moons sparkling, so kiss me.

Kiss me down by the broken tree house,
swing me upon its hanging tire.
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat,
we'll take the trail marked on your father's map.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight,
lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand,
strike up the band and make the fire flies dance,
silver moons sparkling, so kiss me.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight,
lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand,
strike up the band and make the fire flies dance,
silver moons sparkling, so kiss me.
So kiss meSo kiss me

- Six Pence None The Richer-

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Buried Sadness

Buried Sadness

I see sadness deep in your eyes,
sadness haunting, haunting....

but the smell of the ocean,
the warmth in the wind,
the life in your smile,
makes me miss you so much more...

Yet, the sadness still in your eyes
sadness sitting, sitting...

to kiss you on a sandy beach
to hold you in my arms,
and know that your mine
makes me miss you so much more...

The sadness prolongs its stay,
so cold, so cold...

I wish I knew what I could do
to take that sadness from your eyes
and bury it far, far away...

But, I will sit, and ponder, ponder
waiting for you to return
as the night prolongs its stay....

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Doggie Name Contest

Doggie Name Contest

As a lot of you know, I have a little cousin named Mary Rose, and she just got a puppy and needs our help to give it a name. Contest details are below. Please help her out, put on your thinking caps and get creative, because she is giving away a mysterious prize....

Mary Rose has a puppy! And the puppy needs a name. Join the contest to name the doggie and win a prize….

Doggies Details

Female, three months old.
Beagle-Daschund cross.
Has lovely face, angel eyes.
Friendly personality, extremely playful.
Can hop like a rabbit!

Contest Rules
1. You may submit any number of entries for the contest.
2. Please submit entries with your full name and phone number.
3. Entries must be submitted on paper to No 5 Lorong Bukit Pantai Satu or via SMS to 012-3996969.
4. Closing date is 20th September 2005 at 6pm.
5. Judges decision will be final.
6. Puppy may be viewed at above address.
7. Winner will be announced on 25th September 2005 together with the prize.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

PM's Handshake

Prime Ministers Handshake

I told you guys I met the Prime Minister of Malaysia, Pak Lah. His hand shake is one of the warmest handshakes I've received in a while, and you know what they say about handshakes? If they are warm and firm, it means they want to know you better. Guess I'll be dealing with Pak Lah soon....


Sunday, August 28, 2005

The missing feline

The missing feline

Yes, I know I have been missing in action for quite some time... been so busy with work and travelling. I just got back from India from my cousins wedding. Want to hear about my trip, give me a call, or just message me through my blog, too much to talk about.

I've got lots of juicy gossip like how I met the Prime Minister of Malaysia. Will post the pictures up soon. As for my trip to India, check out the pictures at my Photo spot. The link is right below my picture on the right margin. Click on "More of the purple cat"

Till then.... Cheers!

Thursday, August 11, 2005

I will never be a...

I will never be a...

I will never be a...

1. Brother
2. Brother in law
3. Father
4. Father in law
5. Grandfather
6. Uncle
7. Granduncle
8. Great Grandfather
9. Great Granduncle
10. Son
11. Son in law
12. Cousin brother
13. Husband
14. Nephew
15. Boyfriend
16. Grandson
17. Franciscon Friar
18. Priest
19. Fish Monger
20. Master
21. King
22. Postman
23. Policeman
24. Head master
25. Fireman
26. Prince
27. Queen's Knight
28. Alter Server
29. Conductor
30. Bridegroom
31. Bestman
32. Paige boy
33. Steward
34. Host
35. Waiter
36. Sugar Daddy
37. Choir master
38. Actor
39. Step Father
40. Step Son
41. Half Brother
42. Singer
43. Sperm Donour
44. Rapist
45. Salesman
46. Pope
47. Cardinal
48. Archbishop
49. Monsignor
50. Abbot
51. Duke
52. Widower
53. Earl
54. Viscount
55. Baron
56. Lord
57. Baronet
58. Rabbi
59. Rector
60. Marquess

All because I am a Woman!

Friday, August 05, 2005

To him...

To him...

"all of life's a play and you, you can contribute one verse!" - Dead Poets Society

I lost someone very dear to me today. He was one of the most amazing person that I have ever met. He believed that if you can feel your heart beat, that means your alive, and that means what ever is dear to you, that you have kept in your heart, is alive too, so believe that you have a purpose in life, and that is to keep that heart beating.

He was a friend I had made when I first stepped into theatre and drama. Someone who believed, that we are all actors born to colour our lives with drama.

I learnt alot from him... He taught me how to love life, and live it. It's so sad to hear that only 24 years of living, and its the end for him. From what he taught me, the most important thing when someone passes away, is not how many years he lived, but whether he lived life? 24 years is short, but he made the most of it, and I just have to respect him for that.

Today, a single white rose was sent to me with a note saying "keep that heart beating and live!" and I did not understand... but now I do, and I am so sorry I did not understand any earlier.

I am going to miss you so much Steven! Thanks for showing me so much.

p/s: We will meet soon on stage in a broadway musical to be performed for Him who loves us all!

Friday, July 22, 2005



Look at me
with a naked eye
and understand me

Walk with me
under a sunset sky
and embrace me

Dine with me
on a random day
and know me

Cry with me
with tears of dismay
and feel me

Swim with me
across the sea
and cleanse me

Colour with me
my life in grey
and love me

Stay with me
in my heart always
and hold on to me

Be true to me
and I shall stay
dont lie to me

and I shall be true to you always...

(Thank you Rafiki for showing me so much)

My Fathers Daughter

My Fathers Daughter

I never understood why man have so much ideals in life, the one that struck me the most is the "worlds greatest father", a man made award through my eyes. A father is a man that has made the vow to take care of you, and knows his responsibilities as a father, and a husband. In my view, a great father is not one who spends time with his family, work for a living, provide for a household, etc., but a man who realises that he is a father and takes great pride in being one. Spending time with family is a good thing, but loving that time spent makes it a great thing.

I never realised how hard it is to love your father while working with him, especially when he is a stubborn, fussy, short-tempered man, who now is your boss. I find it so easy to get carried away with work, that we tend to forget what we do and why we are doing it. We dont work with passion nor understanding of what we really are doing, yet still dream endlessly of a life long fortune. By doing this we stray away from our true indentity, and what we are to others.

A great father is a man, despite all the work and conflicts, knows that he may be a boss, but he is still a father, and she may be an employee, but still his daughter. I may disappoint you daddy, but know that I try. Despite all the reasoning, I am my fathers daughter.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Electronic Newspaper

Electronic Newspaper

I always thought that fiction will always stay fiction, and imagination was just what we want in life. After watching Harry Potter, where we see people move in a picture, reports updating itself on a piece of paper, I never really thought that this could one day be real. Yes, let me introduce you to the electronic newspaper. I discovered this today when one of my workmates was telling us how in the future we would be so advanced in technology yet still living with traditional styles.

An electronic newspaper is a self-contained, reusable, and refreshable version of a traditional newspaper that acquires and holds information electronically. (The electronic newspaper should not be confused with newspapers that offer an online version at a Web site.) The near-future technology - researchers expect to have the product available as soon as 2003 - will use e-paper (electronic paper) as the major component. Information to be displayed will be downloaded through a wireless Internet connection. A number of versions of the future technology are in development, although there are two frontrunners: Xerox's Palo Alto Research Center (PARC) is working on a newspaper that would consist of a single sheet of their e-paper (called Gyricon), while Lucent, in partnership with a company called E Ink, is working on a multi-page device (also called E Ink).

The Gyricon version consists of a single sheet of transparent plastic, containing millions of tiny bichromal (two color) beads in oil-filled pockets. Text and images are displayed through rotation of the beads that occurs in response to electrical impulses: a full rotation displays as black or white, and a partial rotation displays as gray shades. Nick Sheridon, a senior research fellow at PARC, has been working towards a viable electronic newspaper for over twenty years. Sheridon sees Xerox's device as consisting of a sheet of Gyricon wound around a spring mechanism in a lightweight cylinder. The user would pull the page out of a slit in the cylinder; in the process, the page would pass over a printer-like device which had downloaded data from the Internet through a wireless connection. To access another page, the reader would return the sheet to the cylinder, select the page, and draw the sheet from the scroll. The device could be carried like an umbrella, and would fit in a large purse or a briefcase. Sheridon projects that a Gyricon-based electronic newspaper could be available within three years. Currently, Gyricon uses 50-micron beads for a resolution of 200 dpi (dots per inch); the use of 30-micron beads will increase resolution to 300 dpi, slightly better than that of traditional newspapers.

Lucent's E Ink device uses electronic ink and combines thin, plastic, flexible transistors with polymer LEDs (light-emitting diodes) to create what are called smart pixels. The process involved - which is not dissimilar to traditional printing processes - uses silicon rubber stamps to actually print tiny computer circuits onto the surface. E Ink uses electronic ink for display: millions of tiny capsules filled with light and dark dyes that change color - charged dye particles move either up or down within the capsules - when exposed to an electric charge. According to Paul Drzaic, the director of display technologies, prototypes of the device have been running on watch batteries. Although the technology has been used for retail signs, Lucent says that an E Ink-based electronic newspaper is still at least 10 years away, because electronic ink has not been sufficiently developed to make complex displays practical.

IBM is also working on an electronic ink-based device. IBM's electronic newspaper is in a book-like format, and is constructed of 16 pages of flexible, fiberglass-reinforced paper, each about 8.5" by 11." The lightweight pages are bound by a rigid metallic bar, and covered with a clear, protective cover sheet. Charged dye particles move either up or down within the capsules - causing light or dark areas to appear in the display - when exposed to an electric charge . The whole device could be rolled or folded similarly to a traditional newspaper. Like the E Ink-based electronic newspaper, IBM's version is several years away.

I never thought there would come a point where the Harry Potter movie becomes more realistic. Looks like it is. It's almost like watching CNN, because you can get the breaking news constantly. I will try and upload some pictures of it. It is very cool. Funny part is, the more advanced we get, we tend to be following the traditional footsteps.

(some source from

Monday, July 11, 2005



I find it ironic...

that a celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

that a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.

that one is a vegetarian not because he loves animals, but because he hates plants.

that Sir Winston Churchill prepares his impromtu remarks.

that John Grisham loves being a writer but cant stand the paper work.

that as a child, the library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you’re grown up, your credit card does it.

that the cure for writers cramp is writers block.

that when your cat has fallen asleep on your lap and looks utterly content and adorable, you will suddenly have to go to the bathroom.

that when a restaurant gets too crowded nobody goes there.

that there is a fish that walks on land-mudskipper.

that on a cold day when it is raining people feel depressed but when it gets cold enough to snow they cheer up again.

What do you find ironic in life? Feel free to express them...

contributed with the help of Rafiki

Saturday, July 09, 2005

Once upon a time, son

Once upon a time, son

Once upon a time, son,
they used to laugh with their hearts
and laugh with their eyes:
but now they only laugh with their teeth,
while their ice-block cold eyes
search behind my shadow.

There was a time indeed
they used to shake hands with their hearts:
but that's gone, son
Now they shake hands without hearts
while their left hands search
my empty pockets.

"Feel at home"!"Come again";
they say, and when I come
again and feel
at home, once, twice,
there will be no thrice-
for then I find the doors shut on me.

So I have learned many things, son.
I have learned to wear many faces
like dresses-homeface,
officeface, streetface, hostface,
cocktailface, with all their comforting smiles
like a fixed potrait smile.

And have learned too
to laugh with only my teeth
and shake hands without my heart
I have also learned to say, "good bye",
When I mean "good-riddance";
to say "glad to meet you",
without being glad; and to say "it's been
nice talking to you",after being bored.

But believe me, son.

I want to be what I used to be
When I was like you. I want
to unlearn ll these muting things.
Most of all, I want to relearn
how to laugh, for my laugh in the mirror
shows only my teeth like a snakes bare fangs!

So show me, son,
how to laugh; show me how
I used to laugh and smile
Once upon a time when I was like you.

written by Gabriel Okara, 1921

This poem is one of my favourite poems as it reflects what we are today. In reality most of us wear masks, and that should not be the way to laugh nd smile. Learn to laugh and smile and take of that mask...


Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Legal Work

Legal work

I started work yesterday, hoping to take away the holiday boredom. Sadly to say, work is worse than bumming at home. Im working with an IT company, that is teaching me how to handle legal work to prepare me as a law student. Law is a fun subject, and can be a little too much to handle at times. This is not true in reality.

I was given this legal case the company is involved in, and asked to read the details of the defendant's (the company I work for) case. All I did yesterday was read. This was a little too easy. What do you want me to do? I had thought it be a little more difficult. Guess not...

I was told, that today I would be dealing with the lawyer involved. I have to call her and get her advise on some of the matters. Finally some real work... At least I hope so.

This is all I have to say about my first day of work. Got to run now... late for work!

Friday, July 01, 2005

Time spent with dad

Time spent with dad

It has only been 9 days since exams got over, and I feel extremely bored. In the past 9 days, I have indulged in a few tubs of ice cream all by myself, arranged my books about 75 times , played about 576 tunes on my guitar, slept for more than 12 hours a day, watched 24 episodes of "The OC", made 7 power point presentations for fun, watched all the movies that I missed during exams ( A series of unfortunate events, hitch, the English patient, be cool, etc...), caught the primere of "War of the Worlds" on the first day of release not to mention excellent seats from advanced bookings, played "Cat Woman" at a movie character walkabout, ate waffles with my cousins, browsed through the classifieds, and spent quite a bit of time with my dear dad.

I never realized how much fun time spent with dad could be. When I was doing my A-levels, I pretty much crowded my life style with books, college, hanging with friends, getting my car fixed, etc... I was always out of the house. The only time I did see my dad would be in the morning, when he would be drinking his black coffee in front of the TV watching market shares on CNBC, or during lunch when we would have a quiet lunch, just the two of us. Those little moments was enough for me to call time spent with dad. However in this past 9 days, I spent more time than I usually did with him. He isnt well, and has been instructed to take strict leave for about 3 weeks. He sits mostly in front of the tv either watching a movie, wimbeldon, news, or searching for his missing DVDs.

We went down to Hartamas Shopping Centre and did a bit of shopping. Shopping with dad meant gadget shopping. All electronic goods, plasma screen TVs, Hi-fi systems, notebooks, hand phones, digital video cameras, kitchen goods(where we bought a toaster), etc... As a bonus, we hit times bookstore, where I had dad searching for the newspaper and after he found that the newspapers were sold out, he tried desperately to pull me out of the literature section where I was totally lost in the books. The only way to pull me out of the section was to get me a few books which he did. I have something to read now, Women in Love by D.H. Lawrence. *Sigh*
there is nothing better than burying yourself in a book, except ice cream off course.

We had spent a whole 2 hours in the mall. Yesterday, I drove him to bangsar where we bought dinner, and 11 DVD's to keep dad occupied. The roads were a little jammed, as I squeezed the steering wheel tighter, knowing that this is one one the few times where dad has sat in a car which I was driving. All the anxiety, not wanting to make a mistake. I had to live up to his standards, his expectations, and that meant good driving, skilled. In the end, he never commented, so I take it that either it wasnt bad driving, or he just couldnt be bothered on how I drove. Perhaps something else was playing in his mind.

There is so many things I want to talk to dad about. My view of the world, how things work, my hopes, dreams and maybe even my love life. 3 weeks may seem like a short time, but I'll use every minute I have. Besides, I will be working with dad handling legal matters ( at least learning about it) starting next week for about 3 months. So looks like I do have more time. Ah, skip it, I just love spending time with my dad!

Thursday, June 30, 2005

What is love?

What is love?

Love is blind ~anon

God is love ~ 1 John 4:16

Love is a fruit of all seasons, and within reach of every hand ~Mother Teresa

Love is not what we become, but what we already are ~ Stephen Levine

Love is an extremely difficult realisation that something other than oneself is real ~ Iris Murdoch

The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference ~Elie Wiesel

Love sees through a telescope, not a microscope ~anon

Love is patient, love is kind, love is not envious, or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way, it is not irritable, or resentful, it does not rejoice in wrong doing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, hopes all things, and endures all things ~ 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two ~ Captain Corelli's Mandolin

The purest love of all if when you do not expect the object of your love to love you back. If they do, it’s a bonus, but when you expect it, it cheapens love ~ Arvind Patmarajah

Love is...Inhaling deepYour fresh smell,Holding you closeTo my chest,Knowing alwaysThat you will be there...~ Obukwor E. Bigjoe

Love is a strong word, you only say it to those who are most important and influencial in your life ~Heather Hoskins

Love, like a river, will cut a new path whenever it meets an obstacle ~ Dj Roberts

Love is like a grocery store, you don't know which one to choose ~Ruhi

Love is truly sacrificing oneself for a cause that can blind you cause of how strong it is ~ Rafiki

Love knows no reasons. Love knows no lies. Love defies all reasons. Love has no eyes. Love is not blind; it sees but it doesn't mind. Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. Love is so easy to feel, so hard to explain; easy to get, so hard to let go; easy to spell, so hard to define ~ Miss Ely

Love is sublime wish,Don't aflame it ~ L.G.Vaidyanathan

You can lead a heart to love but you can't make it fall ~ anon

Come on time to fill in the blanks with your view

Love is......

Tuesday, June 14, 2005



Water, wine
Vodka lime
We sit and drink at night

Vanilla coke
Gin and juice
Night prolongs its stay

Tequilla shots
and margaritas
talks the night away

Whiskey, shandy
Rum and brandy
holds what is left of the night

Mix the drinks
mix and drink
and we will drink the night away...

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Much more today

Much more today

I love you very much more today,
I wonder why not yesterday
When I felt you in my sleep,
in my dreams, I hope to keep.

I love you very much more today,
I wonder why not last month in may,
When the flowers start to bloom.
Your love would take away the gloom.

Yet I love you very much more today,
I wonder why today I feel this way,
When a day is just another day,
Why not love you much more another day.

Monday, May 30, 2005

I stab like a serial killer

I stab like a serial killer

I hurt someone.

I hurt a couple of them.

It wasnt supposed to be this way...

I know I am in the grave wrong,

yet I know even if it did not turn out the way it did,
It was his plan...

Sometimes there is too much on my mind,
and I stab...

My stab is like one of a serial killer,
it leaves behind a trademark,
that is so difficult to wash away...

Yet I stabbed him...

I stabbed her...

and now it is as if I have stabbed myself,
in hurt and pain...

Does a serial killer feel the pain of the one he stabs?

My stab lingers in the night,
and rest itself upon the heart,
almost forever...

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Wisdom hurts

Wisdom hurts

Im sitting here sulking. It is so painful. My wisdom tooth is finally showing. I can see a quater of teeth forming at the back of my jaw. It is so painful!!! Does this mean I am wiser? So being wise hurts huh? ouch.... snif* sob*snif* ;(

worst time to go get wiser during my exams, the pain...oh well... this is life!

Im Wiser not older...hehehe...

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

To water

To water

O water! Thou art deceiving
from your gentle flow
to the streams of your undying
existance thats fights tomorrow.

I stand, and you cover my body
with your clean, mineralised, firm hands
hands that work its way
from my head downwards-where it lands

at my feet, now cold
with your presence, so alive.
You are clean, but you mold
fresh stains that in me dive

deceiveing me into believing
how pure and chaste you are.
The word goes, "shower, its relaxing"
yet it brings much affair.

I wonder how you always
deceive me into believing
that alls fine, and my ways
are good in absorbing

isolated coldness, bringing sorrow
yet no matter how much you stain me
I will return to you tomorrow
to be decieved again- but thats how it is.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Making my stationary purple

Making my stationary purple

I bought new stationary today. 3 stabilo medium tip ball pens (which after buying is dismantled and the inside of it is placed into a purple stabilo fine tip ball pen casing), a ruler (which after buying I would colour purple with a permanent marker pen), an eraser (not purple, just plain white), a note pad (purple cover) and a pilot shaker mechanical pencil (also purple).

All this minor adjustment done to my stationary serves to live up my purple social standing. My entire pencil box is purple with a few neutral colours which cannot be avoided. It is rather a waste of time, people say, as only today I realized, that everytime I buy new stationary it would be right before an exam. Yup, my exams start this Thursday, and I am sitting and colouring my ruler purple.

Ironic, I never buy new stationary unless there is an upcoming exam, and I spend so much time making minor adjustments just so it suits me. Just a weird lil thing I like to do. It relieves stress.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

Scared with pain

Scared with pain

I do not want to recall it. The moment, so painful, which scared me for life. How she cried for help, and I stood helplessly, watching the car go up in flames. My heart just broke. She was everything to me, my cotton candy buddy, my shoulder to cry on, my inspiration, my best friend... But now she is gone. Nothing of her remains, nothing except that hollow cry for help, her very last cry. The thought just haunts.

Why should I have to go through this much pain again? Can you not sympathise with me? I do not want to hear your last cry, not now, not while you are still so young, so alive, so you... You mean the world to me, do I not mean something to you, that you can still do that, still chip of a bit of my heart each time you do this.

Please... Do not let me go through this much pain again. That is all I ask from you.

Thursday, May 12, 2005




You have a date!!!
I thought we are going together, all single?

You know I cant take a date..
It will be wrong, not fair to him.

I have to take someone!!
I am going single!!!
but i'll be alone...

Do you have to do this to me?


He wants to take me?
Where did you hear this?

Oh my gosh!

(the author is a little confused as to whether she should go single to the a levels ball. Mindless... she has gotta focus on her exams now!)

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Between two

Between two

She likes him and he, he likes her too. Is it fair for anyone to stop them from liking each other? Who are we to say who she is meant to go out with, or allowed to date, or just have heaps of fun with? This bond is between the two of them not the whole world. So why are they those who cry a tear not knowing what to do next, and those hot heads trying to melt away this bond? From her speech, we know she loves him. Yet, she is forced to sacrifice something. True love, or real happiness?

The thought of this just saddens me, as I wish I could do something. I guess, in the end its between the two of them.

Monday, May 09, 2005

The meadow

The meadow

As I sank into the meadow
I felt the weather change
and suddenly all temperature decreases
in the middle of the avenue
What a wonderful feeling it was
to be loitering around tall foggy grass
feeling the ground where only the pollution of the morning due lay.
I could hear wind roaring strongly
blowing with all might.
I could hear the song of the forest,
tickling my eardrum with delight.
it was like the angel of nature,
just flew by
bringing times of good in life.
I could only see half of the meadow,
as the rest were covered with haze
it was like clouds, the sky,
the blue and white.
Green is the lush meadow...Green soft and cool.
A patch of the desert awaits me in the centre of the meadow
Yet, here the grass is cool and the air is moist.
Small beads of sweat for on my brow
I walk slowly, searching for something...
The cool breeze relieves my desperate search...
Reminding me of the past.
Reminding me of the nights of passion.
Reminding me of the evenings of laughter.

(I wrote this poem with an old friend, Rudhra in 2001, and a dream brought it back)

Sunday, May 08, 2005

Dr Love

Dr Love

This past week has just been filled with loads of conflicts in love and relationships. Today I play the role of Dr Love. Dr Love who is running short on remedies. Never had to deal with these many problems before. Let me share some situations with you.

Problem 1: Ahmad really likes Rachel, and having some hints from close friends that she liked him, made the effort to confess this to her. Having done so, she turns him down saying she liked someone else. Ahmed now feels confused and hurt, and afraid of what would happen if this mysterious other person happened to be his friend. He may have to exile himself from the group to 'save face'.

Problem 2: Jasmine has been dreaming of her dream guy Pradeep, waiting patiently that some day he would ask her out, often day-dreaming of him. One day she hears rumours from various people about Pradeep, advising her to keep away from him. Now Pradeep goes and asks her out to the upcoming ball. In a daze she says yes, but is not sure after hearing all these rumours. This is her dream guy, could he be so bad after all?

Problem 3: Sameer falls madly in love with Jasminder, who comes from a pure punjabi family who values traditions like a goddess. Sameer says he has never felt so much in love before. After only a few days of sneaking behind her parents back, going out, her mum comes to know about it, and threatens to tell her friend Carry's mum about Carry's relationship with her boyfriend Paul who is also kept in secret if Jasminder refuses to break up with Sameer. Jasminder and Carry are best friends.

Problem 4: Steve and Kelly have been going out for 5 years. One day Kelly walks in on Steve kissing Dave, his soccer buddy. Kelly is wondering if that meant her relationship is over, or could Steve just be foolin around?

Problems, many for a week. There are 7 other problems might I conclude. Although these are the striking ones. Never have I played Dr Love before, and this is starting to be alot of fun although the doctor is running short on remedies. Feel free to assist Dr Love on any of this problems. She needs your help! So start studying on medical love...

(names have been altered to prevent conflicts and protect each individuals reputation)

Saturday, April 30, 2005

Angels hang out again!

Angels hang out again!

I went out with Jess and Ham today. Been a long time since the three of us hung out. You would expect us, being known as the "Charlies Angels" to hang out together all the time, but I guess we are all busy in our own work, whether it is study, work, or even family. We went for lunch and then a movie, "the pacifier". After which we went to do a little shopping for a wallet. Now I am not a fan of shopping, a boys best friend when it comes to shopping. I only shop when I need something.

Our close friend, Matt, who joined us on this hang out and was caught to be extremely bored of us girls going in and out of shops looking for a wallet and most of the time coming out empty handed. Lucky for him and I, we had Ham who knew mid valley at the tip of her fingers. Just name the shop, and she would be able to give you the exact location of it as well as what it sells. That cuts down the number of shops we have to check out. We spent a good 3 hours together, and after having no luck at getting a nice reasonably priced wallet we decided to leave.

It was a nice, short hang out, with a great movie (you have to watch it!) and I enjoyed it. It was an Angel's hang out and as for Matt, he could play the charming, sexy Bosley for today . That tops up an episode of the Charlies Angels get together.


Friday, April 29, 2005

Birthday Showers

Birthday showers

Its my birthday today, and to mark this day I would receive showers, which i prefer to call showers of blessings. Yes, thats right! Every year on the 28th of April in Malaysia, it will rain. It's ironic, how I know this fact, and still had lots of pool parties in the past years which most, get ruined by the birthday rain. Maybe I was born on a rainy day and rain was something I should love? Unfortunately, I dont fancy rain at all. All it does is ruin my perfectly straight mouisturised hair. Rain is good on hot days, but it still ruins my hair.

Its funny how hair texture and condition can change with a little rain water. Rain water is not water you should wash your hair with. It does not contain enough minerals as the water we get in the bathroom. Today, the rain that pours down is also filled with acid. Hence, your hair is easily damaged by it. So for those of you who love playing in the rain, know what your getting your hair in for.

Enough of disaster pool parties, next year onwards I will be having rain coat parties. Bring a rain coat, and lets have some fun in the rain without getting our hair wet. Dont believe this fact? Check it out, there are loads of statistics on the net regrading weather reports on months and days in the past years. You would note that every year in Malaysia on April 28th it rains!

"Rain down on me!"