Thursday, February 18, 2010

Benefit of the doubt

I got to a point in my life, where I simply can't trust anyone. Definitely influence of being in the legal field.

Golden rule: you CANNOT trust anyone.

Clients tell lawyers their version of the story everyday and the famous line "you can trust me" is used so loosely. In fact this is just an addition to the common misconception that lawyers are liars.Then in court, almost certainly new evidence reveals itself. You then discover the client that you trusted 110% in fact only told you 10% of the REAL story.

Doctors, engineers, teachers, drivers and many others all face this blatant truth.

This isn't just with professional relationships.
You can't trust anyone with anything,
not friends, best friends, lovers, spouses, parents, siblings,
not even priests (don't forget they too are human)

not 100%, not even 80%,

Trust places expectations on something or someone.
Trust raises expectations on something or someone.

You can go on with life telling everybody you trust them,
only to realize the husband who vowed to love you forever, has fallen out of love with you.
only to realize the father you thought was loyal and kind, was in fact screwing your neighbours maid.
only to realize the boyfriend you thought was the one, never felt the same.
only to realize the friends you have, have been back stabbing you.

Trust raises unnecessary expectations. It does no good. All it does is it keeps you in this state of happiness for a short period of time, and when the truth sinks in, it hurts.

When someone says "I trust you", don't get your hopes up. They simply mean they give you the benefit of the doubt.

friends, best friends, parents, siblings, cousins, lovers.
please do not be offended:
I simply don't believe in trust anymore.
It's too much to carry and when it breaks (and it always does)
it hurts bad...

I love you all, not because I don't trust you'll.
I love you all because I simply give you'll the benefit of the doubt that you wont hurt me like I've been hurt before.

So this is my theory :
trust is unnecessary, so don't trust. just give people the benefit of the doubt....

It's been working for me. Also a great way to manage a bad temper.

Take it from a taurus...


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